this post was submitted on 21 Aug 2023
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There's no irony here, that's exactly how it's supposed to work. My point is not that every space on the internet needs to be as protected as beehaw. My point is that it's valid for people to create and seek out spaces like beehaw if they feel like it, and to be protective of them, which you didn't seem to understand. But of course it's just as valid to not need that and engage in the kind of argument we're having here right now, because different places can have different rules, and that's totally fine, as long as you respect the rules of whatever place you interact with.
I'm not in beehaw, I'm out here in a reality-based internet forum. I see why people might want something protected, but that doesn't make it less weird to me, and it IS totally fine to think that it's weird.
Beehaw is to Lemmy (or any open forum on the internet) as planet fitness is to fitness. It's idealized and safe to the point that it no longer really fits in it's category. You can make the internet nice the same way you can get fit on bagels and donuts while walking the track: by pretending.
Nothing is wrong with pretend, but if you ever watch LARP you'll understand that it's strange to come across in the wild when adults do it.
What are you even talking about. The people on beehaw are not trying to pretend that the internet as such is nice. They are creating a community with a specific code of conduct, and that is just as real as any other place on the internet. You can still talk about shitty stuff, and you can have dissent, conflict and discussion on there, nobody pretends that that all doesn't exist. The only requirement is that you approach with respect and well-meaning by default for everyone around, there's nothing else to it. On the contrary, I feel like people who don't want to follow these rules are the ones pretending - pretending that they're not interacting with real people, that anything they say doesn't affect others.
You seem to be under the impression that any "nice" space must be fake, because, I don't know, people are inherently not nice, or something, and thus everyone must be just pretending? That's a pretty sad way to view the world, and absolutely not true in my experience. I know plenty of great places and communities made of people that just genuinely want the best for others by default, both online and offline, and it takes no pretending, it only takes a bit of caution to keep the very few people out that are not there to participate constructively and can't or don't want to clear the pretty low bar of respect and well-meaning.