My dad has recently been caught having an affair with his young personal assistant. Huge scandal; mom was very angry. Now they’re in the middle of divorce proceedings. Mom moved out, the other woman moved in and I chose to stay with him because we’re super close; he’s like my best friend. Now mom’s telling me to go and live with her and go no contact with him cause he’s a bad person and by continuing having a relationship with him I’m condoning his actions and “ignoring her suffering”. My relationship with my dad hasn’t changed, I don’t see why I should end it.
Everything involving humans is more complex and complicated than it might seem at first glance.
Everybody makes mistakes, even your loved ones.
You only have one dad, so it's better to forgive them. (I didn't forgive mine for other mistakes, and that was my mistake. Now I'm old and he is dead and that's that.)
Your mum is being selfish and manipulative because she is afraid and hurting. It's not right what she is doing, but see the points above for her as well.
Life is hard and unfair and difficult for everybody. For your dad, for your mum and also for you. It sucks when you're stuck in the middle of other people's problems, but remember all of this will pass.
And remember to take care of yourself.
Hugs my dude. You'll get through this and so will they.
Edit: 7. Time. Let things take time. Don't rush what you feel or what you should feel. Don't go overthinking everything. Things that are complicated need time to settle.