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this post was submitted on 10 May 2025
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Relationship Advice
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The harder one compresses a spring, the more wild and unpredictable its travel will be when it gets released. Stressing a spring too much results in permanent damage too. If you want to release the tension and avoid damage, one must gradually release tension in a controlled manner.
Your ultimate goal is to allow the little spring to actuate well on its own. She will never do this if someone else is controlling and making rules. Depending on her emotional versus intellectual intelligence and reasoning skills, the best course of action, in my opinion is to explain the situation and constraints. Then clearly explain your expectations. Explain the consequences in terms of the potential impact on her life, and the consequences of disappointing you. Finally let her formulate her own constraints, how she can manage herself, and what should happen if she fails.
Her reasoning about the situation and solutions shows exactly what she is thinking, her real depth of reasoning, and what to watch.
Even at 24, you likely still have a ways to go in self awareness. Humans are not cognitively fully developed until 25. I am forty, and gained much of my self awareness about psychology and functional thought as it differs and relates to other types of people throughout my 30's. In the USA, we focus far too much of the age of majority as some kind of benchmark of adulthood, but never forget, the age of majority at 18 is arbitrary unscientific nonsense and only exists because this is the earliest age when boys are physically developed enough to carry the full kit for professional murderer orgies. It is the age when these kids are most easily manipulated in to stupid situations in support of thugs and corporate criminal enterprise. There are only two relevant scientific epics in our life cycle, puberty and a fully formed brain at 25. The age disparity between these two points is largely why we exist as a species.
We live in a world where having a child is like slavery and a nearly insurmountable expense for most. That is how I would put it. Having a kid will ruin you for life and lead to slavery in all but name unless you do absolutely everything right first and only have a kid when it is planned.
Don't repeat the lie about age 25, it's not only false but it's being used to justify laws restricting adults rights. In fact you can't get transgender healthcare in Oklahoma specifically because of this. Don't be part of the problem