this post was submitted on 02 Apr 2025
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No one will ever know my Cajun ass ancestors are from France and that I have the gene where you’re urethra is so damn wide, you can pass the child yourself if you had to.
I encourage hostile governments (including my own) to study my DNA. It’ll ruin morale. Balls so big, they have a tenuous atmosphere and a measurable time dilation effect.
Tell that to the swat team raiding you because ai confused you with a mass murderer or something worse.
I live in Louisiana. The police don’t come for a few hours even if you call 911. If someone swats me, it might take 5 days before someone gets around to it. And I have a nice machete so they’ll probably just file it under “suspect had left the scene” and enjoy some overtime pay.
Been to Louisiana. Can confirm.