this post was submitted on 10 Aug 2023
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I mean…it kinda makes the most sense to bring Jesus back.
Still none of us would leave the house to rent movies if blockbuster came back.
None of us have shopped at toys r us since were had our own money to spend, so toys r us wold exist to us all the same way it does now: a fond memory.
RadioShack…I mean, would anyone not buy their shit online if that happened? Nah.
And if you bring Jesus back…he’s a socialist pacifist Jew that might have a chance of setting the worst America has to offer right on their misguided opinions. We need more powerful anarcho-socialists, especially powerful ones—and I mean, literally powerful. He is purportedly magic. Boom. Goodbye capitalism.
No question. Bring Jesus back. And Conan. Being Conan back.