30
submitted 4 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

Great grandpa started a security firm for banks and shit back in the day grandpa made friends during the war, next thing you know the entire family business is installing lasers and security cameras ans trapdoors and God knows what else in all these secret military sites or oil cleanup things that are secretly military sites. I had 2 uncles, Snarling Frog, the oldest and Boastful Boar being the youngest, my dad was a middle child. Anyways, they each got on different sides of the curtain, one had a gig with the cia, another was working with the soviets, same guy kidnaps the both of em 9 years apart and has them work on his fake oil rig. My dad went to go find em and ended out in this real mixed up outfit Zamzibar Land, child soldiers and shit, he went real Nic Cage in that War Lord movie. Me? I try to keep my nose a bit more clean than those guys, little less nose candy for this guy, ain't the 80s no more. I get this real simple gig setting things up nice at this weapons disposal whatever in buttfuck Alaska. This place was so far from OSHA compliant I could not believe it was government. The elevators had an 800 lb weight limit, I'm sure that's not accessibility compliant let alone practical and ladders going up 2-3 stories with no fall cages, bad show, really anyone trying to get in would probably just hurt themselves on that slippery ass helipad out front. I guess maybe they can use it in the summer? Anyways, I put all them cameras and traps in or I know the guy who did so ask me anything.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[-] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago

how do you find the right balance of camera coverage? I need to keep my secret military installation secure but im not trying to waste budget covering every inch of the site with cameras and then paying some shmucks 12$ an hour to watch all those feeds.

what's your favorite trap? I prefer the classics myself, and anything involving lasers. funny story that's how i got this eyepatch.

[-] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago

You wanna keep your surveillance camera count low. Keep them mostly in narrow corridors and near tight corners and make sure there's more of them the closer you get to crucial command centers. Never ever install any outward facing cameras on the walls of any bases. You mostly want them directly beside doors so half of the the view is of the wall above the door. We also like to use a more cinematic lense so people watching the monitors keep paying attention, the fisheye we attach means it has a very narrow range of focus and cannot perceive a human body in a thick vest sidling along a wall beneath it. Every pro has its con right?

Lasers are for really important places. Like the pantry next to the bag of flour or between different sections of the building. The trick with lasers is they should always be at least 2 and a half feel off the ground. Wear a bulky jacket and lie down to check for that. If the laser doesn't safely pass over you, it's gonna get set off all the samn time by pests and you don't need that. Best to have a good clearance over the ground with lasers. I Connected one to a system that seals the whole room shut and pumps poison gas into the room. Had to make the lasers move up and down for that one too. Good thing I was smoking or I wouldn't have seen the beams and I'd have inhaled a bunch of poison gss.

this post was submitted on 26 Jan 2025
30 points (94.1% liked)

ama

19728 readers
1 users here now

Welcome to /c/AmA

Want a scheduled AMA announced ahead of time? Contact Awoo directly at the bottom of this sidebar.

Please stick to one of either three post types:

A standard Ask Me Anything post.

A request post -- (What is the format and why should I make a request post?)

A gauging interest post -- (What is this?)

What is an AmA?

AmA’s or “Ask Me Anything” began on the old internet, originally AOL chatrooms, later followed by Slashdot. They are crowdsourced interviews where the interviewee first makes a post describing who they are and what they do. Commenters then leave questions and can vote on other questions according to which they would like to see answered.

The interviewee can then go through and reply to the questions they find interesting, and easily see those questions the internet is dying to have the answer too. Questions will be a mixture of radical, serious and lighthearted resulting in the kind of interview you won’t get elsewhere.

What Topics Are Allowed?

Anyone can do an Ask Me Anything. The topic of the AmA must meet the rules below, and in some cases you must provide proof of the claims you are making. Ask Me Anything topics fall into two categories:

Something that plays a central role in your life. The prime example of this is a person's job; posts about someone's occupation are almost always allowed. A person's topic should be something that they know thoroughly and is important to them; this gives them more to discuss and a more thorough background in the field.

A truly interesting and unique event. An example would be "I organised a protest against x." It's an activity that doesn't play a central role in someone's life but is so uncommon that many users would not have experiences of their own to relate to it.

AmAs should NOT be about:

Mutual-Aid and Crowd Funding - AmA submitters that include any aid or funding campaign must be eligible for an AmA without the campaign for it to be allowed. Additionally, the focus of the AmA must not be the campaign -- those posts would be more appropriate in the mutual-aid community. Posts about suicide.

Other Restrictions:

Giveaways are not permitted on AmA. Contests and giveaways already running on a third party site prior to the AmA are acceptable

Proof

Proof in the case of public figures or orgs may be a social media post on an official account. For other topics it may be a proof image. This does not always have to be included in the post at the time of posting and it may be discussed with the moderators and provided privately. We will ALWAYS respect your complete privacy.

founded 4 years ago
MODERATORS