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this post was submitted on 18 Jun 2024
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Does it help if someone forces you to do the thing or is is better to give time and space until you decide to do it? Asking for a friend.
For me personally, and a few others I know, it's definitely the latter. However, everyone is different, so it'd be interesting to see other people's replies.
Agreed. Definitely the latter.
I think this is way more of a shitty personality trait of mine than anything, but for some reason, if I've already gotten in the headspace to do something, and I'm preparing for it or thinking about it at that moment, etc. and someone tells me to do, I either get angry, almost like a, "I'm not an idiot you don't have to tell me," kind of way, or it totally deflates me and I get knocked out of that headspace for some reason.
I don't get what that is, but after having to wrestle with my own brain just to get simple tasks completed, having that additional stress just messes me up.
I think the reaction depends on how aware one is of how one's flow state works. Neurotypical people seem to be able to get back into it much easier than us ADHD types, but I think that's often because our flow states tend to be deeper, so it's much more annoying to be knocked out of it for seemingly trivial reasons by people who don't know how hard it is to get back into that state after an interruption.
In my opinion, this is (mostly) a "training issue". If I know this is how my brain works, it's my job to train those around me on how to help me be as efficient as possible, even if it's something as simple as "if my headphones are on, do not interrupt me unless something is ON FIRE, OR if I have been working for more than 3 hours without a break."
If either of those things are true, it's also my job to not be annoyed by the interruption, which is of course often harder than the interruption itself.
that sounds somewhat like Pathologic Demand Avoidance