Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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Adding on one aspect to things others have mentioned here.
I personally have both ports/URLs opened and VPN-only services.
IMHO, it also depends on the exposure tolerance the software has or risk of what could get compromised if an attacker were to find the password.
Start by thinking of the VPN itself (Taliscale, Wireguard, OpenVPN, IPSec/IKEv2, Zerotier) as a service just like the service your considering exposing.
Almost all (working on the all part lol) of my external services require TOTP/2FA and are required to be directly exposed - i.e. VPN gateway, jump host, file server (nextcloud), git server, PBX, music reflector I used for D&D, game servers shared with friends. Those ones I either absolutely need to be external (VPN, jump) or are external so that I don't have to deal with the complicated networking of per-user firewalls so my friends don't need to VPN to me to get something done.
The second part for me is tolerance to be external and what risk it is if it got popped. I have a LOT of things I just don't want on the web - my VM control panels (proxmox, vSphere, XCP), my UPS/PDU, my NAS control panel, my monitoring server, my SMB/RDP sessions, etc. That kind of stuff is super high risk - there's a lot of damage that someone could do with that, a LOT of attack surface area, and, especially in the case of embedded firmware like the UPSs and PDUs, potentially software that the vendor hasn't updated in years with who-knows-what bugs lurking in it.
So there's not really a one size fits all kind of situation. You have to address the needs of each service you host on a case by case basis. Some potential questions to ask yourself (but obviously a non-exhaustive list):
So, as you can see, it's not just cut and dry. You have to think about each service you host and what it does.
Larger well known products - such as Guacamole, Nextcloud, Owncloud, strongswan, OpenVPN, Wireguard - are known to behave well under these circumstances. That's going to factor in to this too. Many times the right answer will be to expose a port - the most important thing is to make an active decision to do so.