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Try not to shit your pants

Try the taco

I recommend Charmin Ultra Strong.

You've got some people saying you gotta slather it in the hot sauces, and other people saying to get ready to have the shits.

Uh, you can avoid the shits by not using the hot sauces.

Have you ever had real Mexican food? Taco Bell is a not a good introduction.

Dorito locos tacos, or DLT as the workers summarize for me but I am too embarrassed to use myself

Baja Blast with whatever you get. Its the best god damn thing about taco bell and im STILL FUCKING PISSED IT LOST THAT ELECTION TO BE YEAR ROUND IN STORS LIKE 7 YEARS AGO

Get quantity over quality (many small tacos)

Beef chalupa

A Seven-layer Steak Burrito & a beef meximelt..... about 12 years ago....

The chicken chalupa is pretty good.

Cheesy Gordita Crunch with the nacho cheese shell on the inside.

The jizz, shit, and piss burrito is a classic.

Soft shell tacos. Easy and does great with any of the sauces. I usually do two fire sauce and one diablo per taco.

All I get at Taco Bell any more is the steak power bowl and the cheese potatoes. The bowl is basically just a deconstructed burrito and the cheesy potatoes are cubed, fried potatoes covered in nacho cheese and sour cream.

Their French fries are also hella good; they're like their own kind of cheese dust covered fry. But the cheese potatoes are just better

I hope you have some Charmin ultra soft ready to go for tomorrow morning

I can recommend the Chalupa and Crunch Wrap Supreme