Despite my one moment of sheer misandry, which I apologize for...I love you guys ❤️

I probably can't offer much in the way of comfort...

NSFW, TMI...I mean, all I can offer is my body, and I doubt you'd want that :P...

...but I really, truly, honestly appreciate all of you guys. Really 💜

Without men, my life would be pretty boring and honestly pointless. And I don't just mean for sexual reasons...

NSFW, TMI...well, the sexual reasons are a big and important part of it too, ngl, but they're not the only reason.

I see and appreciate you. You matter 🩷
To me. To your families. To everyone here ❤️

This isn't much comfort, but if any of you guys needs someone to talk to, my Matrix account is:
@horny_miisha:chat.blahaj.zone
Feel free to reach out!

You're not alone. You're never alone. I love you guys 💜

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[–] 9 points 8 hours ago (2 children)

If I'm honest for a sec, I've been struggling lately.
Work has been super intense and nothing I can do ever feels like it's enough.
Deep down, I know it's not a me problem, hell, I'm the best damn person for this particular task, it's just... a lot. That also means I'll have to lead this thing for a month, away from home this time.
People see how I fix things and think it's easy for me.
It's not. I'm just used to making shit work at the cost of my own self.
I'm tired of paying that toll and I don't know how much longer I can keep it together.

I recognize this present overwork-dragon facing me, I've been down this road before and I know how wholly it can consume me. Not even in a vore way either.
Being away also means there's nobody to fuck my brains out or use me as a toy to take my mind off this thing.

Still, silver linings... this time I'm lucky enough to have my soul-friend-bestie along.
It doesn't make it less bullshit, but at least we're going insane together.
Anyway, idk why I'm dumping a wall of text here.
Gotta get back to it... peace.

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  • [–] [S] 3 points 3 hours ago

    Don't feel bad about sharing your feelings. Never do!
    I'm sorry you're struggling like that. I know how rough things can be, but not like this. I'm sorry...
    I'm glad you're still here with us. And I'm glad you have such a good friend in your life 🫂
    I can't really offer much, but if you'd like to talk about any of this stuff, I'm here.
    Please don't give up! You're not alone in this 🩷

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  • [–] 1 point 3 hours ago

    Work isn't more important than your well being, you deserve to be seen. I'm so happy to see that you've got a supportive partner. You matter. You matter independent of the work you do for others.

    It gets better <3

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  • [+] 1 point 6 hours ago
    [–] 12 points 13 hours ago (1 child)

    I lost my dad to sucicide when I was younger, it's a deamon that trickles down and has knocked at the door at multiple points in my life. But I think knowing what happens after is what has helped me embrace life as much as I have. The sun will always rise tommorrow

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  • [–] 5 points 13 hours ago (1 child)

    I lost a good friend to suicide a few years ago. Around the same time, I was sexually assaulted by a friend I had confided in about my grief. He got away with it because I was too afraid to speak up, and to this day nobody knows it happened. The only reason I'm still around is because I know firsthand what it's like when someone you love kills themselves.

    Thankfully, I'm doing much better these days, but I'll never forget both what being suicidal feels like, and the exact reasons why I'll never do it.

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  • [–] [S] 3 points 4 hours ago

    That's so messed up...I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I can't even imagine...
    I'm glad you're still here 🫂
    If you'd like to talk about any of those things, I'm free. I'm here.
    Please don't give up! The world is better with you in it. Stay strong 💜

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  • [–] 3 points 12 hours ago (1 child)

    Thank you for posting this. It's been a rough year and this helped. A lot of people just kind of expect a guy to drop dead of they have any problems, Feels like.

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  • [–] 4 points 13 hours ago (1 child)

    NSFW, TMI

    …I mean, all I can offer is my body, and I doubt you’d want that :P…

    Girlie, you have a great man and growing following on the naughty side of the Fediverse. You sure about that? 😏

    Also, having a person to talk to can be very important, and it's cool of you to share this 😊

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  • [–] 46 points 23 hours ago (1 child)

    The patriarchy is the enemy of men and women alike.

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  • [–] 10 points 13 hours ago

    It’s even the little things. I am only now learning how to properly take care of my skin because… it’s just not something men are generally taught is important/how to do (in British culture, at least)

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  • [–] 2 points 12 hours ago (1 child)

    Thanks, we love you too!!!

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  • [–] 25 points 22 hours ago* (5 children)

    I'm just going to share this here, and it's entirely anecdotal.

    I'll put it behind a drop down so read it of your own volition.

    spoiler

    Somehow despite being quite the introvert I have somehow managed to encounter numerous men who have been horrifically abused by the women in their life, myself included. For example one young lad who regularly slept with his own mother, a grandmother who did wildly inappropriate things with her grandkids (hiding candy in her clothing...)

    I lived with emotional abuse from my mother, and a creepy cougar teacher who was far to interested in a younger me.

    Later in life, I had a small group of friends and out of the 4 of them, all 4 had been out right sexually assaulted.

    One guy was roofied at a club by a wannabe dominatrix who didn't understand BDSM, woke up in her bed chained up.

    Another woke up to an older female cousin raping him while he was sleeping on a couch.

    Then there was the guy who worked in bars, hen parties were a nightmare and plenty of women would get handsy and see nothing wrong with it.

    There's more but I don't remember right now, and I don't want to dig it out.


    So in summary.. why am I mentioning this here?

    It's not to bash anyone, but rather to suggest that just like many guys are told to watch their brothers for abusive behaviour we should encourage women to be aware of the kind of abuse that other women can dish out and intervene if possible.

    Also, if you do try to engage with a guy about his emotional state, do consider that it is extremely common for men to have in the past opened up to a partner only to have it weaponised against him thus making him hyper vigilant about doing so again.

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  • [–] 11 points 19 hours ago

    The catholic Church in France alone has sexually abused at least 200000 children between 1950 and 2020. that is 1% of the population. In the context of catholic abuse it's mostly males so it is safe to assume that around 2% of the male french population was sexually abused as a child by the catholic Church.

    The notion that sexual abuse is only a women's problem is pretty much a myth.

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    [–] 18 points 21 hours ago (3 children)

    Fuck I didn't expect to tear up browsing Lemmy for memes but here we are

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  • [–] 82 points 1 day ago (6 children)
  • [–] 29 points 1 day ago* (5 children)

    Famously, the first major legal win for feminism was a man getting custody of his child.

    Its sad that so many men have swallowed the propaganda that feminism is somehow hurting them.

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  • [–] 3 points 13 hours ago*

    Feminism is good, but I do not think it's right to fight for men's rights under this banner. It's simply too easy to hijack by reminding that feminism is, in principle, about women's rights (hence the name), and completely lose the part about men from the conversation. This happened before, and it will happen again.

    It's very unfortunate that "men's rights activism" was also hijacked by patriarchal assholes who have nothing in common with actual men's rights. But masculism as a whole can be remedied, and can complement feminism organically as part of a broader antisexism movement.

    So, ideally, we should agree on feminism being a movement for equality with focus on women's issues, masculism is the same but focusing on specific issues of men, and both uniting to bash patriarchals and fight for a better, more equal and just future.

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  • [–] 19 points 1 day ago (2 children)

    Patriarchy absolutely hurts men as well and I don't want to take away from your comment. I fully support it. And I fully support men revolting against the patriarchy and living how they want to live without the pressure to conform.

    The first major legal win for feminism was about a mother being granted custody because before 1839, fathers were automatically granted custody of their children.

    The Custody of Infants Act of 1839 is often seen as the first feminist legislative victory in a long campaign to reform English marriage laws (Shanley 17, Chase and Levenson 40). While legal scholars have noted instances when a father’s total control over his legitimate children had been limited by judicial rulings prior to 1839 (Abramowicz 1345), the 1839 Act stands as the first major reform to recognize the rights of mothers. The important role played by Caroline Norton in the passage of the Act is also key to recognizing the law as a feminist triumph (Shanley 17).

    Prior to the 1839 Custody of Infants Act, a father had a right to his legitimate children and was automatically granted custody if he and his wife separated for any reason (Bailey 393). Most fathers granted custody or access to the children’s mothers because it was considered ungentlemanly to deny mothers the opportunity to be with their children. Judges could also require a father to grant access or custody to the mother in circumstances in which the children’s welfare would be in jeopardy if they were left with their father. (Bailey 394)

    Source

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  • [–] 144 points 1 day ago (5 children)

    Hard to be depressed when we are absolutely dominating the leaderboard for these stats. Oorah fellas! 💪

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    [–] 1 point 12 hours ago (2 children)

    Maybe its just because they arent allowed to Nut in November

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  • [–] 12 points 22 hours ago (2 children)

    This is also partially due to men choosing more violent methods that are harder to revoke. To slightly oversimplify, women tend to OD, men tend to chose guns, and if you OD with pills you usually have a few minutes at least to call for help that you don't get with a gun.

    So, just remember that part of gun safety and responsible ownership is a) storing the gun unloaded, b) having a trusted friend that you can give the gun to in the event of a mental health crisis, c) knowing your own signs and symptoms that indicate that plan needs to be activated.

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    [–] 7 points 20 hours ago

    I'm a boy, I'm a boy
    But my ma won't admit it
    I'm a boy, I'm a boy
    But if I say I am I get it

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  • [–] 17 points 1 day ago

    For all the men reading these comments. My heart goes out to you that are suffering. I'm glad you are still here with us.

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