Asklemmy

Ow!

I am one with my bookshelves. Unfortunately the Steam Deck hasn't fared well.

I might be stuck in the floor since I'm laying on a mattress on my left side.

If this involves some kind of adjustment of orientation, then I will be doing an early Father Christmas act and coming down from where I have appeared halfway up the chimney (being generous about how wide that chimney is). If it doesn't, then I am going to be part of the brickwork - except for my guts and arse, which will rot in place in the chimney over the next few weeks.

I would be spooning my dog who is on the other end of the couch. If this was a competition I’d submit my outcome for winner or at least most wholesome. Some of y’all’s are definitely more funny though.

I live in the wall now.

I am now sitting in a different chair at the same table. I continue browsing Lemmy on my phone.

I would be rather sad since I would be sitting next ro my chair on the floor instead of un my chair. My coffee would also be out of reach. I would be sad.

I'm european, so it doesn't affect me at all.

My husband is very happy, but he also dies (in his video game)

I've merged into my bed and finally have an excuse to not get off of it.

I have either bisected the wall, or the wall has bisected me.

I'm still on the couch, slightly further away from my wife.

My left arm is now part of the wall, so at least I didn't die outright.

My ass is now on the ground instead of a chair, ow

I'm taking a shit in my bathroom cabinet now.

Fuck, I'm merged with the side of the sofa, and my cat's ass sticks out of my chest. I don't care already though, she mixed with my heart and lungs.

I instantly swapped chair in the dining room.

I'm now outside the train going 200km/h and have a nice, hard and long fall in half a second to look forward to.

My cat Ralph is not gonna be happy about that.

I'm pooping. Two feet to my left is a wall. I'd be inside the wall D:

I die because I get teleported into the earth's air which mixes into all my muscles and bones and organs, destroying most of my cells, stopping my heart due to blood bubbles in my heart if I don't instantly die from that, while a vacuum 2ft next to me implodes.

I am inside a refrigerator. Not so great

I die with my body stuck in the foundation. Now my house is gonna be all stinky >:(

Stuck in concrete wall / window T_T

I find myself sitting inside the end table next to the sofa, instantly destroying it along with a lamp a ukulele, and several glasses I haven't taken to the sink yet

I am in the vacuum of space.

Inside a decorated Christmas tree. Maybe I can blame the cat for all the glass bulbs I'd break?

Whose left? If I'm lying on my left side do I go straight down?

I am now sitting on the laptop my company gave for work, most likely breaking it. Which is unfortunate, but I can probably just request another.

i telefrag my partner, killing her instantly

not a good way to greet the day, admittedly

I have a bag of Skippy Peanut Butter Balls lodged in my ass. If I move they won't be there any more ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Dead. I'm laying on my left side.

I'd be shitting in the neighbor's toilet. It would probably be hard to explain why I'm in their apartment in my underwear.

I’m partially clipped into a wall. I’ve fallen into the backrooms.

I am now a propane stove/human hybrid.