I can't believe this website is free
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Day 1: Taco and Prune juice night Day 2: Make them breakfast - coffee and bran flakes; bran muffin. Day 3: Make a cake. Chocolate. Use a pastry bag to ice it with chocolate icing. Be absolutely sure they see you squeezing out the icing onto the cake with a very satisfied, nearly orgasmic look on your face. Make eye contact. Smile. Wink.
Try the old finger trick.
Ahahahaa! Pick your sides, friends. For reference: The infamous "three days no poop" thread
Going to be legendary. (May be they are gaming us all.)
I guess, the classic 80s comedy staple might work - spike their food and/or drink with laxatives