this post was submitted on 17 Jul 2023
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Asklemmy

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[โ€“] [email protected] 57 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Randomly spawning lots of money

[โ€“] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago (1 children)

How to: get kidnapped and imprisoned for life by a cartel.

[โ€“] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I would absolutely keep it a secret, so not a problem

[โ€“] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah, until it happens out in public and suddenly there are huge piles of cash surrounding you.

[โ€“] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Exactly, you can't control when it happens. So hello spawning thousands of bills at the local swimming pool.

[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Just only ever go to private resorts or places where everyone is richer than you anyway

[โ€“] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Yeah, rich people are well known for their strong moral fiber and lack of desire to passively accumulate endless money.

[โ€“] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Randomly spawning money directly in my bank account

[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Monkey paw: your account gets flagged and eventually you go to jail

[โ€“] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Plot twist: The money to spawn comes from other people randomly. Eventually people start reporting vanishing money at the same time that people hear news of a man randomly raining money wherever he goes. This immediately sparks controversy and religion, as the country begins to destabilize and the economy grinds to a halt.

The government gets together and decides that changing the currency to a new note, so as to avoid it being conjured away and raining somewhere east of Massachusetts, is the only solution forward.

This has an unexpected blowback, as the superpower is to spawn money, not useless green paper. The rain immediately changes to the new currency.

Discovering this loophole, the government changes the currency to bowling balls in the hope to have the problem solve itself.

You now randomly hail bowling balls around you and the local bowlingalley owner is a tycoon. You killed ten pin bowling. I hope you're happy you bastard.

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

This guy has it firgured out.

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Andrew Bailey, governer of the bank of England, actually has this super power and why inflation is running away in the UK. Turns out spawning lots of money has ramifications elsewhere. Can I argue the Bitcoin creator had this super power too? No, fair enough

[โ€“] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

A bit, yes, definitely, but that's been going on since 2008, and inflation is running away now because the energy generators got heavily on the iTs wArTimE bandwagon and saw that they were getting away with it. Other companies got in on the same act and corporate profits have never been so high, ever.

Quantitative Easing is why the stock market didn't crash early and often and the gap between rich and poor got much, much wider.

So the Bank of England in my view enabled crisis inflation a bit, but it was the energy generators that really pushed the economy into maximum fleece the little guy mode. Raising interest rates won't fix it because disposable income isn't the problem. It's rampant profiteering that's the problem.

[โ€“] [email protected] 32 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The ability to cure any disease/illness or unwanted mental disorder/illness in anyone nearby within a certain radius. Might as well focus on it helping others if it's completely random.

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Granted: The radius is 5cm around your heart.

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Gotta get those healing hugs in. Challenge accepted.

[โ€“] [email protected] 24 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Instantly getting the (positive) effects of a full 8 hour sleep. Would be nice to just randomly get a boost in energy, or sometimes not have to worry about sleeping.

[โ€“] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Then for the next week your internal clock is messed up and you can't actually fall asleep when you want to.

[โ€“] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Monkeys paw: It activates at 1am and throws off your sleep cycle for a couple of days.

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Granted: it only activates after you've had a minimum of 8 hours of sleep.

[โ€“] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The power of regenerating my body's cells without the flaws introduced by aging.

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Granted: It only activates after you turn 85.

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I will take it.

[โ€“] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago

To become increasingly lucky.

[โ€“] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

Movie-grade intelligence and/or hacking ability. Can be pretty normal most of the time then go on binges of doing really cool things and just kinda be perceived as a genius eccentric.

[โ€“] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

Luck

I can't think of a situation I wouldn't want it.

[โ€“] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Randomly have green lights on my commute so I don't have to slow down goddamnit.

[โ€“] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Critical hit. And start a career in the octagon.

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Plot twist , it happens after you've been injured on your way to the hospital.

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Bigger plot twist it applies too well and you use it once and go to jail.

[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The ability to make anyone I view as an enemy suddenly lose their train of thought whenever they are speaking with other people outside of dreams.

[โ€“] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

And what tge fuck did I do to become your enemy??

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Regeneration, Wolverine style.

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

That's a curse, not a blessing. Especially if you have no control over it.

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

high jumping

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Inverting the adverse condition from having no control over when it activates to include conditions about it only activating in a specific place seems to solve a lot of the malicious compliance type side effects. Given that it seems to be a malicious compliance type scenario, it can't be ruled out that that the final ace-up-the-sleeve would be that it never activates.

With those axioms, I'd probably go with something like: "activate 'creative mode' while sitting at my computer in my place of residence"

That way whether or not it actually engages, it's in a favorable location where my body is occupied and generally no harm comes to it beyond sitting in one place too long. If it never activates, who cares? If it does, yay! :3

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Monkeys paw: you randomly teleport to your desk

[โ€“] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Making person around happy/recover from his sufferings.

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