Ask Lemmy

I always thought it should be even between both parents, along with a staggered return to work at the end. So ideally you can have parents then working mostly alternate days for a few weeks before a full return to work. And the employer shouldn't be allowed to have any say in it because otherwise its inevitable that pressure is put on you not to take it.

Don't feel bad. I'm a man in the USA working in a corporate office. When my son was born I took my time off and it was fantastic for bonding with my son and helping my wife out. Honestly IDK how so many women do it alone.

I'd feel worse about making my wife work extra hard than my colleagues... That said, the person covering my area screwed everything up so badly I decided it was better to find a new job vs fix it. So I took my three months, worked a week and put in my notice and got paid out for another two months of accrued leave.

I was really close to my dad and I LOOOOVEEE that you're doing this. You're showing your child and the world that dad should take an equal share, especially post birth when mum is likely to need additional support. Your post is nothing short of inspirational!

Paternity leave is awesome, did so myself (male). Even though it was 2010 and in Europe a lot of paperwork came up because it was not my wife...

You are absolutely right! 85% is nice money and especially in the first months it's super important to spend time with your new born and to support the mother.

And for all those fuckers who think that you "aren't working" in this time... Well, get a child and take care of it. It's way harder than you think. You will see, it's gonna be a hard but also rewarding time. My second daughter is now 3 months... And boy, to see everything that is happening within 3 months. It's unbelievable and makes me so happy.

You're on the right path.

I wish I had paternity leave - I feel like I missed out on so much plus it was unnecessarily difficult for my ex. Back then we only had one week. However my mother-in-law came for that week and my ex “wanted her Mom”. So I sat at home for a week doing what I could while my mother-in-law took care of my ex and kid, then week two I had to go back to work and mil had to go back home, and my ex was home alone with the baby, no support

FYI - a bit eye opening on who some feminists actually are (in a good way) - a feminist group at work used me as a poster child to demand more paternity leave.

I think maternity and paternity leave should both be compulsory six months, to be taken as desired between pregnancy and 2nd birthday

Doing paternity leave is a good must and normal. Being an absent parent is not good.

Godspeed and congratulations with your child!

If you can live on 85% then it's an awesome opportunity, and super rare in the US. I'd be trying to find something to bridge the financial gap, some under the table gig or something because I already don't make enough.

Make it a year of pto, and you get to spend that time over the next 18 years. I'd happily take a week after birth and then more time off later as they get older.

Yeah we haven't in Australia, seen people take it , it's a great idea

Not sure what this post is about, OP... What are you actually asking?

Paternity leave is obviously vital if you're a decent parent and partner. If you have it available you take it and you focus on your family. Your mentioned group of coworkers sound like fucking degenerate scumbags stuck on a pointless treadmill. I feel sorry for their partners and their children.

You should take some time to consider why you didn't have a visceral reaction of outright disgust and had to come here and ask for others to chime in. Tune in, bud. It's all about your kids now. Don't look for worthless approval from worthless people.

I love my wife and kid, but I was ready to get outta the house after two weeks and go back to work