top 50 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[โ€“] 111 points 3 years ago* (4 children)

In about 5 minutes I get a complaint her storage is full.

I have unspeakable amounts of pictures of my cats saved. No, I will not delete the ones that are nearly identical.

  • source
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [โ€“] 95 points 3 years ago (2 children)

    Nothing? She already has access to it all anyway...

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • load more comments (2 replies)
    [โ€“] 84 points 3 years ago (2 children)

    I'd start by wondering how in the hell I got a girlfriend, then my wife would do the same.

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • load more comments (2 replies)
    [โ€“] 83 points 3 years ago (5 children)

    Dunno, but I have a girlfriend now.

  • source
  • hideshow 5 child comments
  • [โ€“] 74 points 3 years ago (7 children)

    It'll take her so long to scroll through all the movies and TV episodes that she'll never get far enough down the file tree to find the niche porn.

  • source
  • hideshow 7 child comments
  • load more comments (1 reply)
    [โ€“] 48 points 3 years ago (18 children)

    She would be disappointed in how untidy my files are.

    "Why is the final version of this project called "test1_b_new_reworked_draft_2_prefinal_dif_font_b_temp_FINAL.png"?

    She would then forgive me because her filing is worse than mine.

  • source
  • hideshow 18 child comments
  • load more comments (2 replies)
    [โ€“] 47 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    If I had a girlfriend, then several gigabytes of my files would be largely useless

  • source
  • hideshow 1 child comment
  • [โ€“] 46 points 3 years ago (4 children)

    I'd then be asking myself when and why I got a girlfriend.

  • source
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • load more comments (4 replies)
    [โ€“] 45 points 3 years ago (2 children)

    Apparently, OP is the only one who's got something to hide from his girlfriend.

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • load more comments (2 replies)
    [โ€“] 37 points 3 years ago

    If she's my girlfriend, she's not going to judge, and instead lend me some of her clothes, help me with makeup, and discover that she's not 100% straight after all

  • source
  • [โ€“] 36 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    Not sure how the girlfriend world react. But my wife would be pissed that I now have one.

  • source
  • hideshow 1 child comment
  • load more comments (1 reply)
    [โ€“] 35 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    My wife gets mad that I have a girlfriend.

    I become very confused at finding out that I have a girlfriend.

  • source
  • hideshow 1 child comment
  • load more comments (1 reply)
    [+] 29 points 3 years ago* (1 child)
    load more comments (1 reply)
    [โ€“] 29 points 3 years ago (10 children)

    My files are already unencrypted and she has the password to my pc. We're both adults so she obviously knows that I watch porn so they wouldn't surprise her. Everything else is just boring stuff.

  • source
  • hideshow 10 child comments
  • load more comments (10 replies)
    [โ€“] 27 points 3 years ago (2 children)

    Wife already has access to my computer and all my files.

    Do people not stream their porn nowadays?

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • load more comments (2 replies)
    [โ€“] 27 points 3 years ago (3 children)

    Well I'm a datahoarding pirate so lots of movies, shows, games, porn, hacking tools, bot creation tools, firmwares, family pics, movie/show posters, ISOs, etc. Nothing to hide really. Might question my complete siterip of cum4k, tiny4k, and anal4k maybe.

  • source
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • load more comments (3 replies)
    [โ€“] 27 points 3 years ago (3 children)

    She'll get bored as going through those files. Meanwhile I'll be trying to figure out if her sudden presence in my life means I'm now bi or homosexual

  • source
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • load more comments (3 replies)
    [โ€“] 25 points 3 years ago

    My wife would probably divorce me for having a girlfriend I didn't know about

  • source
  • [โ€“] 25 points 3 years ago (5 children)

    My bf wouldn't care, lol. It's mostly boring. And the spicy stuff is already stuff he's seen.

  • source
  • hideshow 5 child comments
  • [โ€“] 24 points 3 years ago (3 children)

    "Wow, so many unfinished projects"

  • source
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • load more comments (3 replies)
    [โ€“] 22 points 3 years ago (3 children)

    What kind of question is this? OP you're sketchy af

  • source
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • load more comments (3 replies)
    [โ€“] 21 points 3 years ago

    I rejoice at having a girlfriend

  • source
  • [โ€“] 20 points 3 years ago (3 children)

    She immediately comes to me for tech support and asks what to do with this data, how to access it, etc..

    You over estimate the technical independence of people near a geek. It's like they gleefully turn their brains off.

  • source
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • load more comments (3 replies)
    [โ€“] 19 points 3 years ago

    What happens? Well, I just got a girlfriend!

    About the files, I don't even remember what's in there.
    So much random stuff.
    90 random PDFs some of which is books I planned and still plan to read, but firstly I need to somehow gain some understanding in mathematics
    Files recovered from 128MB MicroSD card I found on sidewalk some years back
    Files recovered from my tablet I had when I was 8
    Files recovered from mom's old phone
    Copies of DVDs I own as .iso files
    1,118 songs I've been collecting since I was 8
    54 "Educational videos" - Electronics plus GSM cracking series
    Leaked source code of FarCry because why not
    212 pictures of Hatsune Miku
    Never Gonna Give You Up video
    1,739 Screenshots
    22 Firefox buttons and banners
    140 satellite images received with my SDR
    1,553 Photos (Camera)
    3 websites downloaded with wget

    And 10s of thousands of insignificant files I don't even remember. But that's just my phone's SD Card. I don't delete stuff, at most I move it to directory named ZZZ_Garbage.

  • source
  • [โ€“] 19 points 3 years ago (2 children)

    Living this right now, but it's great. She's organizing my entire plex server!

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • load more comments (2 replies)
    [+] 18 points 3 years ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago) (1 child)
    load more comments (1 reply)
    [โ€“] 17 points 3 years ago (2 children)

    ~8tb of movies and tv shows all 100% legal ๐Ÿฅฐ

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • load more comments (2 replies)
    [โ€“] 16 points 3 years ago

    Neat, free backups! Thanks!

  • source
  • [โ€“] 16 points 3 years ago

    Nothing. She has a login on my system and can access pretty much anything already, minus emails and dropbox I believe. But there's nothing worth hiding either.

  • source
  • [โ€“] 15 points 3 years ago

    She gets bored looking at it all, probably. The most interesting thing I there is nudes of her.

    Ok, she would get a little annoyed with all the pictures of her sleeping. She hates me taking photos of her asleep.

  • source
  • [โ€“] 15 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    My wife flips her fucking lid.

  • source
  • hideshow 1 child comment
  • load more comments (1 reply)
    [โ€“] 15 points 3 years ago* (last edited 3 years ago) (2 children)

    Probably just ask why I have so many pictures saved of other people's cats.

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • load more comments (2 replies)
    [โ€“] 14 points 3 years ago

    None of my shit is encrypted because none of my shit is interesting enough to warrant it

    ๐Ÿคท

  • source
  • [โ€“] 13 points 3 years ago

    My SOโ€Œ already has my files, encrypted or not, on their NAS (part of an arrangement where I keep my backup on their NAS, and they'd keep their backup on my NAS--once I manage to have one). I doubt they even gave it a look.

  • source
  • [โ€“] 13 points 3 years ago

    I get nervous about her discovering I'm married to someone else.

  • source
  • load more comments
    view more: next โ€บ