Transmasc

I’ve been told I don’t act enough like a boy and that I need to be more masculine.

Hey that sounds super-affirming (/s)!

Check it tho, it can be super affirming if you want because even cis amabs like me get told they're not masculine enough, allllll the time! Welcome to the man club bro lol look in your back pocket it's your man card you walked in with it cuz you've been here all along. The secret of man land is ain't none of us ever masculine enough to be the "real men" ideal we only think we want to be. You're valid whatev kind of man you are

Comments so far seems to be mostly telling you that you are valid, and I would also like to start off by affirming that, but I would also like to try to directly address your question.

Let's say, for the sake of argument, (what? Ben Shapiro doesn't own that phrase) that the behaviour and feelings you describe are not normal for transmascs. What does that mean for you? Is the transmasc label important to you? Would you change things about yourself to confirm to normal transmasc-ness? Or would you try to find a different label? When you describe yourself as a transmasc demiboy, what is it specifically you are trying to convey about your identity?

Whatever you are, or want to be, is valid, and I guarantee there's a bunch of people who will feel a similar way. Between "he/him lesbians" and "afab femboys" etc. there's a whole world of people who probably have similar feelings, and if you are feeling some conflict between your own identity and the transmasc label, maybe it's just a case of trying a slightly different label? Or just describe yourself as transmasc anyway if you want to? No one said you have to be normal.

You can act however you feel. If someone is telling you to be more masculine or feminine, they are an asshole. It's all a sexy spectrum and no one is under any obligation to act any certain way in terms of gender expression. Be your true self, the world will be better and more interesting for it.

"In this galaxy, there's a mathematical probability of three million earth-type planets...and in all the universe, three million million galaxies like this one. And in all of that, and perhaps more, only one of each of us."

Doctor Leonard McCoy

Everything that makes you you is a miracle. Don't surpress it.

One, like everyone else has said, you're completely valid regardless of how you choose to present or what parts of medical transition you do and don't choose to do.

Two, the stereotypical medical transition isn't the only option available. For top surgery, the stereotypical double mastectomy with nipple grafts like I had isn't always the only option - you're probably a great candidate for periariolar and keyhole types of top surgery, both of which should leave you with virtually invisible scaring and leave you with full nipple sensation after recovery, and both options are fairly commonly available.

Also, DHT is the form of testosterone that is responsible for most of the downstairs growth, and it can be made into a topical cream - there's a few surgeons who recommend it before bottom surgery but it's very hard to get in the US and I'm mostly just mentioning this because there may be a way to get just the effects you want in this instance, but for so many reasons this option is a lot less likely.

I have only recently started to question my gender identity (in the last year or so) so I'm no elder queer but In observing the trans/gender queer community I can say I've seen a fair amount of transmasc that enjoy having a cutesy aesthetic so I'd say it's not crazy out of the ordinary. The most important thing is to be true to yourself and what you want. Dont be something or some way based on anything someone else says you should be.