951
Parenthood failure (lemmy.world)
submitted 10 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
all 18 comments
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[-] [email protected] 213 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

"Okay honey, it's really cool that you're Gay and all. But could you, like... Go back in the closet and come out again? It's for something that's very important to me" 🥺

[-] [email protected] 164 points 10 months ago

This man will never take a shower in peace without being haunted by this memory

[-] [email protected] 30 points 10 months ago

You mean “shake a tower”. 🤦‍♂️

[-] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Is that an euphemisms for masturbation?

[-] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

No. It’s a dad way of saying take a shower, by switching the first two letters of each word.

Edit: another one is the fit has hit the shan, which is a less vulgar way of saying the shit has hit the fan.

[-] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

Guess I still need to work on my own dad jokes, as mine apparently went "whoosh" right there.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

It will be on his tombstone.

[-] [email protected] 58 points 10 months ago

Homie has the opportunity to ascend to a higher plane of dadhood and completly blew it

[-] [email protected] 44 points 10 months ago

You should turn in the dad card immediately, the offices are open 9-3. The regulations were clearly defined - no exceptions.

[-] [email protected] 28 points 10 months ago

Probably need to buy a few pairs of New Balance and khakis for redemption

[-] [email protected] 27 points 10 months ago

"You are a father but we do not grant you the rank of 'Dad'."

[-] [email protected] 25 points 10 months ago

Devastating.

[-] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago

Are you sure you're even her dad?

[-] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Man needs a paternity test ASAP

[-] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago

gonna have to take your dad classes again

[-] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago

Task failed successfully

[-] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

In a similar situation, i just looked at my wife and said "you owe me 5€."

this post was submitted on 26 Aug 2024
951 points (97.7% liked)

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