this post was submitted on 18 Aug 2023
340 points (97.2% liked)

internet funeral

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[–] [email protected] 57 points 1 year ago (2 children)

"The tides go in, the tides go out. You can't explain that."

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Tch. Can your science explain why it rains?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

(it’s a Bill O'Reilly quote, so old it belongs in c/antiquememes)

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)

And their quote is from the first Avatar series.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Also the source of this little beauty:

are you serious meme face.

The guy he was talking to (I believe he was the president of some atheist group) made that face.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Have you ever seen the rain. Coming down. Sunny day?

Checkmate science nerds.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Lol, that was my first thought also

[–] [email protected] 47 points 1 year ago (4 children)

I’m sure some people have felt electricity.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 year ago

Spoiler: that shit can hurt

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I have felt electricity multiple times. It is never fun, but you definitely can feel it.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Your suspicions are confirmed. I have indeed worn wool socks and touched a metal item.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

As a kid I one shoved dough hooks into an extension cord. Fun times!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Thank you for your service. 🫡

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Yep. And it was no fun, I can tell you. But I definitely felt it!

[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 year ago (3 children)

At first I had a lot of questions, but the Bible verse at the end cleared them all up.

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[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

nobody has ever seen, heard or felt it

I've done all of those things. Seen lightning bolts and heard their thunder, have heard the hum of transformers or the whine of the lines themselves and arcing bolts of electricity from broken ones or Tesla coils. I've been electrocuted both from static electricity, and once when I was cleaning lint out from behind my washing machine.

You can see it. You can hear it. And you definitely can feel it. It fuckinf hurts!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You know what you can't see, hear and feel? God.

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Dumbasses never heard of lightning?

Next week on Stupid Shit Evangelicals Actually Believe: “Men have one fewer rib than women, because Space Dad used one of Adam’s ribs to create Eve. This cannot be disproven because there is no way to see inside a human body.”

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago

So this is the shit that evangelicals want taught in schools?

It makes sense, you need your sheep to remain dumb if you want them to believe and do dumb shit

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Fucking magnets, how do they work?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Just like regular magnets, but... lewd?

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 year ago (19 children)

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plasma_speaker

You can literally see and hear it , you could even touch it briefly if you like.

The irony of this page ending with a bible verse that specifically references lightning ...

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 year ago (1 children)

it says nobody has observed electricity, only to later mention lightning...

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 year ago

What kind of jokebook is that? "No one has ever [...] felt it." - you git, just grab a life wire and hold unto it - the next guy you will be talking to is probably God.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Now I'm interested I want to know if they're actually really dumb or if they're just trying to make everyone else really dumb.

Do they actually not know where electricity comes from.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

It comes across as someone who dropped out of highschool to become a barefoot pregnant wife, and sometimes hears snippets of science on the TV. "Some people think electricity comes from the sun!" Technically true, but not very accurate.

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

TV comes on, TV goes off. You can't explain that.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

It’s the effing dog, sitting on the remote

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think this actually explains electricity pretty well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMEPnKYX5C0

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

I half expected this to link to a video for the song The Electric Boogie. This was better.

Also, the hand movements slay me!

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (3 children)

"Who has seen the wind? Neither I nor you: But when the leaves hang trembling, The wind is passing through.

Who has seen the wind? Neither you nor I: But when the trees bow down their heads, The wind is passing by."

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If we don't know what electricity is or where it comes from... How do we make all those wires splurge a bunch of it into your church's organ where Mrs Abernathy plays the same two tunes every Sunday, eh?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

The electrician was divinely inspired by God, obviously

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The techpriests rigged it up after uttering a prayer to the Omnissiah

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Priest: "Dear congregation, we have gathered here today to honor our Lord and Savior. Today's prayer is read by the 9 year old Kevin"
Kevin: "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOOD!"
Priest: "And skulls for the skull throne, Kevin. Very good. Thank you!"

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You'd know you'd felt - and probably seen/heard - electricity if you ate a nice big arc of it. Not even counting lightning; I've seen high voltage arc several meters in a nice blinding line that would kill anyone it touched fucking dead. Maybe whoever wrote that nonsense should try it out for themselves. Even 120 from an outlet would do - it'll certainly wake you up in the morning.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Checkmate, atheists!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I really want to know the title of this book

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (7 children)

It's a "Science" textbook for Christian schools (although probably more often used in Christian home-schools) published by Bob Jones University. I don't remember exactly what grade it's for, although 2nd or 3rd seems about right. I'm only remembering bits about it from seeing this posted elsewhere online. Although, I was one of those home-schooled children of Christian parents and had the 2nd edition of this textbook around 25 years ago when I was in that grade. IIRC it had improved a bit by then, but it was still similarly shallow and had just as much religion sprinkled throughout.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Someone needs to show whoever wrote this lightning and tesla coils

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