I need to get up without waking the wife and kids, I got a smartwatch to vibrate and it woke her. The alarm is always going to wake the house.

Is there anything else?

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[–] 121 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (3 children)

Vibrating butt plug with timer

Realistically, your wife is your partner and some sacrifices need to be made. If she can't sleep through a watch, she should consider earplugs or just deal. I'm sure you silence it and leave the room ASAP so, that's just life of sharing a room with a spouse.

Edit like literally millions of spouses have tolerated their other rising before them, it's a normal part of the deal

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  • [–] 3 points 2 years ago*

    My dad has had the single fucking loudest alarm clock for literally my entire life. It's such a god awful racket. It had to be, because my dad has the worst snoring I've heard in my life. Man sounds like a chainsaw, and you can hear him clear across the house. My mom would sleep directly through it all. It's wild.

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  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago

    Damn, I was coming here to say this. All I can add is that maybe sleep on your stomach with one of these, otherwise it could wake her up vibrating the mattress, since she sounds like a light sleeper.

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