▲ 70 ▼ A fine dining restaurant served a quadriplegic woman a desert that read "happy birthday wheelchair" (thelemmy.club) submitted 6 days ago by sanitation@lemmy.today to c/mildlyinfuriating@lemmy.world 14 comments fedilink hide all child comments
[–] running_ragged@lemmy.world 11 points 6 days ago (1 child) Not even. It wasn't the same hand that wrote those letters. Maybe a server wrote it after the fact, or maybe the client did to get story and a free dinner. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] tal@lemmy.today 29 points 6 days ago (3 children) Hmm. Could be. searches https://www.msn.com/en-us/society-culture-and-history/social-issues/nj-woman-baffled-by-hurtful-birthday-dessert-message-at-weehawken-restaurant/ar-AA2aMzua A spokesperson for Blu On The Hudson sent CBS News New York the following statement: "We at Blu on the Hudson are aware of the recent video circulating on social media, and we are deeply saddened by what occurred. We sincerely apologize to the guest and to everyone who was hurt or offended by this incident which took place on June 20, 2026. Treating every guest with dignity, respect, and care is fundamental to who we are as a company. "We want to provide some context regarding what happened, not as an excuse, but to explain how this unfortunate mistake occurred. "Our standard operating procedure is to use table and seat numbers on tickets to identify where each dish should be delivered. In this instance, the word "wheelchair" was used as a reference to identify where a birthday dessert with a candle should be delivered. Unfortunately, that notation was misunderstood and was written on the plate itself. There was absolutely no malicious or disrespectful intent behind the notation. However, we fully understand how seeing that word written on a plate could be deeply hurtful and upsetting. "Since the incident, we have reinforced with our team the importance of following proper ticketing and communication procedures and have taken steps to ensure that something like this does not happen again. We have also made an attempt to reach the guest directly to personally apologize, although we have not yet been able to connect with them. "We understand that an apology cannot undo the hurt or frustration caused by this incident, but we sincerely hope it conveys how deeply sorry we are. Blu on the Hudson is proud to be a part of the Hudson County community, and we are committed to being a place where every guest feels welcomed, respected, and valued. "We are deeply sorry for this occurrence, have learned from it, and are committed to doing better moving forward." permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 6 child comments replies: [–] Blooper@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago 10/10 apology; would forgive. permalink fedilink source parent [–] running_ragged@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago (1 child) That's a well crafted PR response that does it's best to accept responsibility and give a plausible explanation, which is what's expected. Doesn't mean its true. It doesn't really fit well with what's in the image to my eyes though. Maybe a second person saw the ticket, thought someone missed a word and added it, but that doesn't make sense at a high end place to have just anybody doing lettering. Looking at that 'Happy Birthday' on a plate and thinking something needed to be added, I would not want to touch that perfect cursive even if I had similarly impressive flow, I can't imagine the different shape wouldn't be acceptable at a place like that. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] glimse@lemmy.world 2 points 5 days ago Well the other explanation is that someone did it maliciously knowing it would cost them their job permalink fedilink source parent [–] moobythegoldensock@infosec.pub 4 points 6 days ago (1 child) That begs a larger conversation about what is and isn’t ok to say informally at work. Certainly “wheelchair” is not itself malicious and is less likely to be mistake prone than Seat 34a, especially if there’s only one patron in the room seated in a wheelchair. At the same time, the affected person might not enjoy being referred to by their disability. I’m honestly not sure what the best solution is. Certainly, “red sweater” is less likely to cause offense than “black dude,” and 99% of the time these won’t be customer facing. I’m torn on whether the mistake was purely in writing it in the wrong location vs. whether the company as a whole should do better. I know in the corporate world you typically don’t write down anything you don’t want read back to you later, and the fact that they realize the patron could be offended suggests that maybe they should adopt a similar policy of “never write down anything you wouldn’t want a customer to see.” At the same time, I’m aware most restaurants are not corporate culture and aren’t trying to be. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 child) The seat itself is probably being identified as ‘wheelchair’, not who’s using it. Wheelchair seating has different dimensions and no seat, so if a restaurant is small enough to only need 1 wheelchair accessible seat to be in compliance with accessibility laws they might just call it the wheelchair seat instead of seat 8. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] towerful@programming.dev 8 points 6 days ago Or someone in the party mentioned it to a server when they went to the bathroom as a surprise "can you do a special dessert for the person in the wheelchair, it's their birthday". So the server just added it to the order without knowing where the person was actually seated at the table. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] tal@lemmy.today 29 points 6 days ago (3 children) Hmm. Could be. searches https://www.msn.com/en-us/society-culture-and-history/social-issues/nj-woman-baffled-by-hurtful-birthday-dessert-message-at-weehawken-restaurant/ar-AA2aMzua A spokesperson for Blu On The Hudson sent CBS News New York the following statement: "We at Blu on the Hudson are aware of the recent video circulating on social media, and we are deeply saddened by what occurred. We sincerely apologize to the guest and to everyone who was hurt or offended by this incident which took place on June 20, 2026. Treating every guest with dignity, respect, and care is fundamental to who we are as a company. "We want to provide some context regarding what happened, not as an excuse, but to explain how this unfortunate mistake occurred. "Our standard operating procedure is to use table and seat numbers on tickets to identify where each dish should be delivered. In this instance, the word "wheelchair" was used as a reference to identify where a birthday dessert with a candle should be delivered. Unfortunately, that notation was misunderstood and was written on the plate itself. There was absolutely no malicious or disrespectful intent behind the notation. However, we fully understand how seeing that word written on a plate could be deeply hurtful and upsetting. "Since the incident, we have reinforced with our team the importance of following proper ticketing and communication procedures and have taken steps to ensure that something like this does not happen again. We have also made an attempt to reach the guest directly to personally apologize, although we have not yet been able to connect with them. "We understand that an apology cannot undo the hurt or frustration caused by this incident, but we sincerely hope it conveys how deeply sorry we are. Blu on the Hudson is proud to be a part of the Hudson County community, and we are committed to being a place where every guest feels welcomed, respected, and valued. "We are deeply sorry for this occurrence, have learned from it, and are committed to doing better moving forward." permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 6 child comments replies: [–] Blooper@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago 10/10 apology; would forgive. permalink fedilink source parent [–] running_ragged@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago (1 child) That's a well crafted PR response that does it's best to accept responsibility and give a plausible explanation, which is what's expected. Doesn't mean its true. It doesn't really fit well with what's in the image to my eyes though. Maybe a second person saw the ticket, thought someone missed a word and added it, but that doesn't make sense at a high end place to have just anybody doing lettering. Looking at that 'Happy Birthday' on a plate and thinking something needed to be added, I would not want to touch that perfect cursive even if I had similarly impressive flow, I can't imagine the different shape wouldn't be acceptable at a place like that. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] glimse@lemmy.world 2 points 5 days ago Well the other explanation is that someone did it maliciously knowing it would cost them their job permalink fedilink source parent [–] moobythegoldensock@infosec.pub 4 points 6 days ago (1 child) That begs a larger conversation about what is and isn’t ok to say informally at work. Certainly “wheelchair” is not itself malicious and is less likely to be mistake prone than Seat 34a, especially if there’s only one patron in the room seated in a wheelchair. At the same time, the affected person might not enjoy being referred to by their disability. I’m honestly not sure what the best solution is. Certainly, “red sweater” is less likely to cause offense than “black dude,” and 99% of the time these won’t be customer facing. I’m torn on whether the mistake was purely in writing it in the wrong location vs. whether the company as a whole should do better. I know in the corporate world you typically don’t write down anything you don’t want read back to you later, and the fact that they realize the patron could be offended suggests that maybe they should adopt a similar policy of “never write down anything you wouldn’t want a customer to see.” At the same time, I’m aware most restaurants are not corporate culture and aren’t trying to be. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 child) The seat itself is probably being identified as ‘wheelchair’, not who’s using it. Wheelchair seating has different dimensions and no seat, so if a restaurant is small enough to only need 1 wheelchair accessible seat to be in compliance with accessibility laws they might just call it the wheelchair seat instead of seat 8. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] towerful@programming.dev 8 points 6 days ago Or someone in the party mentioned it to a server when they went to the bathroom as a surprise "can you do a special dessert for the person in the wheelchair, it's their birthday". So the server just added it to the order without knowing where the person was actually seated at the table. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] Blooper@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago 10/10 apology; would forgive. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] running_ragged@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago (1 child) That's a well crafted PR response that does it's best to accept responsibility and give a plausible explanation, which is what's expected. Doesn't mean its true. It doesn't really fit well with what's in the image to my eyes though. Maybe a second person saw the ticket, thought someone missed a word and added it, but that doesn't make sense at a high end place to have just anybody doing lettering. Looking at that 'Happy Birthday' on a plate and thinking something needed to be added, I would not want to touch that perfect cursive even if I had similarly impressive flow, I can't imagine the different shape wouldn't be acceptable at a place like that. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] glimse@lemmy.world 2 points 5 days ago Well the other explanation is that someone did it maliciously knowing it would cost them their job permalink fedilink source parent
[–] glimse@lemmy.world 2 points 5 days ago Well the other explanation is that someone did it maliciously knowing it would cost them their job permalink fedilink source parent
[–] moobythegoldensock@infosec.pub 4 points 6 days ago (1 child) That begs a larger conversation about what is and isn’t ok to say informally at work. Certainly “wheelchair” is not itself malicious and is less likely to be mistake prone than Seat 34a, especially if there’s only one patron in the room seated in a wheelchair. At the same time, the affected person might not enjoy being referred to by their disability. I’m honestly not sure what the best solution is. Certainly, “red sweater” is less likely to cause offense than “black dude,” and 99% of the time these won’t be customer facing. I’m torn on whether the mistake was purely in writing it in the wrong location vs. whether the company as a whole should do better. I know in the corporate world you typically don’t write down anything you don’t want read back to you later, and the fact that they realize the patron could be offended suggests that maybe they should adopt a similar policy of “never write down anything you wouldn’t want a customer to see.” At the same time, I’m aware most restaurants are not corporate culture and aren’t trying to be. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 child) The seat itself is probably being identified as ‘wheelchair’, not who’s using it. Wheelchair seating has different dimensions and no seat, so if a restaurant is small enough to only need 1 wheelchair accessible seat to be in compliance with accessibility laws they might just call it the wheelchair seat instead of seat 8. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] towerful@programming.dev 8 points 6 days ago Or someone in the party mentioned it to a server when they went to the bathroom as a surprise "can you do a special dessert for the person in the wheelchair, it's their birthday". So the server just added it to the order without knowing where the person was actually seated at the table. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 child) The seat itself is probably being identified as ‘wheelchair’, not who’s using it. Wheelchair seating has different dimensions and no seat, so if a restaurant is small enough to only need 1 wheelchair accessible seat to be in compliance with accessibility laws they might just call it the wheelchair seat instead of seat 8. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] towerful@programming.dev 8 points 6 days ago Or someone in the party mentioned it to a server when they went to the bathroom as a surprise "can you do a special dessert for the person in the wheelchair, it's their birthday". So the server just added it to the order without knowing where the person was actually seated at the table. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] towerful@programming.dev 8 points 6 days ago Or someone in the party mentioned it to a server when they went to the bathroom as a surprise "can you do a special dessert for the person in the wheelchair, it's their birthday". So the server just added it to the order without knowing where the person was actually seated at the table. permalink fedilink source parent
