1173
He was very mature about this (thelemmy.club)
submitted 1 month ago by to c/memes@lemmy.world
257 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] 46 points 1 month ago (6 children)

It depends on the more on what is at stake more than just the ultimatum. Get sober or get out is very different than stop your hobby or get out. No matter how you try to get someone to give up their running club, it's probably an abusive move.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 6 child comments
    •
  • [–] 19 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    You either never cheat on me or this relationship is over.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
    •
  • [–] 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

    It doesn't matter though, you're still a massive asshole in the other person's mind.

    Even if it's objectively something positive, like stopping drinking or other destructive behaviors.

    People have to want to change themselves, if they don't, you're just being a dick. It's very different if your partner wants to change habits and lifestyle and asks for your assistance.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
    •
  • [–] 7 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    It's part of setting boundaries and letting someone know that they exist. You aren't being a dick of someone chooses meth over a relationship. No one is entitled to a relationship, there are plenty of acceptable reasons that could be ultimatums to end a relationship.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 1 child comment
    •
  • [–] 1 point 1 month ago*

    the methhead thinks you're a dick though.

    ask any of my exes and they will tell you what an awful abusive piece of shit I was, for not 'fixing' their addiction issues for them and 'judging' or 'punishing' them for it. and plenty of their girlfriends 100% took their side.

    people are not rational and objective when it comes to relationships when they are in them. They hardly ever look back and go 'gee that guy who dumped me for my meth problem, he was so great and I was the shitty person in that situation'.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent