I think you're reading things into this thread that aren't there. Nobody is saying women should be forced to mother grown men. You're entirely right that women shouldn't have to bear the brunt of someone else's unresolved childhood trauma.

But there's a massive difference between expecting a partner to fix you and simply seeking a support network from other people. And your partner is a natural part of that.

Expecting people to just "grow the fuck up" by sheer willpower ignores everything we know about psychology and trauma recovery. It's counter productive. If someone is struggling with an abusive past, telling them to wipe their own ass doesn't help. Instead, point them toward resources like therapy, support groups, or journaling. These actually do help.