Bit of a tangent and a big YES I am a giant fucking nerd - but I do text based roleplaying. People online don't know my actual gender (chick) since I'll play anything. One huge thing I noticed when playing a dude is a lot of the women would just kinda be there and try to be sexy hoping I would do something.
They didn't all write like that, and I still had a few guys to starfished, so to speak, but goddamn YOU NEED TO ENGAGE ME. If I wanted something pretty, I would look at a painting. I need an activity.