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Anon thinks there is a bicurious double standard (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 1 year ago by [M] to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works
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[–] 8 points 1 year ago (4 children)

I'll be honest, I can't imagine not being able to cry in front of my partner. It sounds depressive.

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  • [–] 6 points 1 year ago* (2 children)

    It sounds depressive.

    It’s how “toxic masculinity” is forced upon men against their will.

    Do we want to be sensitive and vulnerable? Sure!
    Do we want partners that can accept that sensitivity and vulnerability? Of course!!

    But when the vast majority of women do not do as they say, or say as they do, the calculus becomes massively brutal and clear-cut: either cram that shit down to where it will never see the light of day, or see it emotionally/sexually revolt our partner and possibly even make them leave.

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  • [–] 6 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    TBH I think "toxic masculinity" is a shitty term for the concept. It feels like calling forced female gender roles "toxic femininity".

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  • [–] 6 points 1 year ago

    Yes! It's intentionally used to invoke blame. Foremost by implying that some list of bad behaviours is only or primarily displayed by men, and secondly by implying that it is the fault of men (often read as all men) when they exhibit these behaviours. I would much rather we just call it toxic behaviour. Both sexes are capable of violence, jealousy, etc. "Toxic masculinity" merely ensures half of the people one is speaking to switch off and might even take the opposite side of the discussion because it's really offensive.

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