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The ADHD Iceberg (lemy.lol)
submitted 2 years ago by to c/adhd@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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Source: https://dice.camp/@Da_Gut/113314558333947531

An outline two dimensional image of an iceberg, with the following text: THE ADHD ICEBERG. WHAT PEOPLE THINK ADHD IS: trouble focusing, fidgeting. (The following is below the waterline, and thus hidden). WHAT ADHD ACTUALLY IS: difficulty maintaining relationships, depression, difficulty following and maintaining conversations, sensory processing disorder, financial problems, anxiety, uncontrollable fidgeting, hyperfixations, poor sense of time, 'all or nothing', trouble recalling commonly used words, sleeping problems, auditory processing disorder, mood swings, inability to focus even if there are no distractions, executive dysfunction, poor impulse control, rejective sensitive dysphoria, forgetting to eat, sleep, go to the bathroom, losing items relentlessly, difficulty switching tasks or inability to stick to one, problems focusing on things even if they are of interest, choice paralysis, trouble regulating emotions, chronic unemployment, forgetting thoughts 0.2 seconds after having them
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[–] 9 points 2 years ago (4 children)

Thanks, that's what we're working toward. I appreciate the encouragement though. We hold him to a high standard, but we also support him in every way we can. He still struggles, but he willingly reads more than most adults I know. It kills me to think of anyone as bright and kind as him not getting the support they need. It's still a daily struggle, but he has more good moments than bad and ADHDers I know recall being "essentially feral" at his age.

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  • [–] 5 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    he willingly reads more than most adults I know.

    I love this. Not just for the obvious ("kid likes reading") but because we live in a society of "TL;DR" and it never made much sense to me. Even with ADHD, I prefer long-form messages and social media that doesn't have a character limit. The rise of "TL;DR" seems to be mainstream, which likely means neurotypicals... it's really ironic, isn't it? Those who supposedly have "normal" attention spans can't bother to read through more than a paragraph sometimes. Yet, those of us who supposedly have an "attention deficit" will pour over articles, books, Wikipedia pages, and more for hours or days on end. We clearly have the capacity to pay attention, even if much of the modern world sucks at grabbing and maintaining it.

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  • [–] 6 points 2 years ago* (1 child)

    That's the ticket really, he has endless energy and focus, provided he is onto something that is actually interesting to him. At 6 he's reading and understanding comics written for young teens (we had a quick word about a character who came out as trans and he easily understood). Sharp kid, just don't bore him.

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  • [–] 5 points 2 years ago

    The most important thing that you can do for this kid is to make sure he knows how to study properly when he gets into school. Every word you've said so far could describe me to a T when I was 6, and I did great in school without ever trying, so when I graduated high school and went off to college I flunked out halfway through because I never learned how to study. It bored me, so when I didn't just "get" something immediately like I had always done before, I often just didn't learn anything.

    I consider that to be the one big major thing that prevented me from executing on the trajectory I was on. Had I learned how to learn when I needed to, today I could be some six figure code wizard milking investment money out of VC's and techbros. Instead I'm an automotive mechanic near the poverty line with no college degree to my name.

    I'm not upset with my own life path, per se, for a number of reasons - I enjoy my work, I consider it ethical (in as far as supporting the automotive industry can be ethical...) and not least of which I'd probably have never met my partner if not for this twisted road I've gone down. But sometimes when I think about it too much the sense of lost potential is a little overwhelming.

    Learning how to make himself sit down and learn something even when it's boring is a necessary skill that he may not develop on his own. I sure didn't, and look where it put me.

    Take up this torch, kid, and do better than me. You have it in you. Someday soon we might all be depending on you.

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