I (20m) have a friend G, (19f) who I met at my college some months ago. she is very nice and kind and we both have a similar belief of things current so we mostly talk when we can on the phone or at school with plans to meet up after school is over.
recently while I was cooking with my brother I mentioned I wanted to take an egg roll or two for G to try since I know that she likes Chinese food almost as much as me. my brother asks me "what has G done for you? has she brought you food?" this made me doubt everything. I've shared my food with her at lunch two times both times she liked it and mentioned she wanted to come to my house to eat. I don't know about her home situation or anything like that I do know she works at a pizza hut and makes money for school that way but other than that and that her sister likes makeup I don't know anything.
I am having doubts about if I'm doing too much for someone I met not too long ago and that my efforts aren't being resciporated. I've always been raised to pay back what you are given "someone gives you 20$ you give them 30$ next week, if you can't do that don't take the money" sort of mentality.
Can I get your thoughts and opinions since you guys are strangers and can approach it objectively?
thanks to anyone who weighs in your opinions and thoughts are welcome.
What? You shared lunch with her two times, and now your brother is making you doubt if you are doing too much for your girlfriend?
What an asshole. Tell him to mind his own business, and just enjoy that you can make your girlfriend happy.
And if you feel like you don't know enough about her, maybe uhm try getting to know her more?
shes a classmate not my girlfriend, and I know about her I just don't know if her family is poor or not or if they are struggling.
Sorry, i read "friend G" as "G friend".
I would still say whatever. If sharing makes you feel good, who cares what your brother thinks.
I personally thinks the whole "something for something" mentality is one of the problems in the world. I like giving, i do it a lot. I don't expect anything back, but i like the way it makes me feel about myself.
i think karma is more practical that superstitious. Doing good things makes me feel good about myself, makes me project a better energy. When i project a better energy, people are more open towards me. More open, and more willing to be generous towards me as well.
It all comes back to you. Don't let your brother make you feel like you can't do something for a friend of yours, especially if you suspect she is down on her luck.