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Totally unrelated to recent events (s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com)
submitted 2 years ago by to c/rpgmemes@ttrpg.network
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Totally unrelated to recent events
@rpgmemes@ttrpg.network

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[–] 44 points 2 years ago (6 children)

If you really want to scare players, throw a gazebo at them

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  • [–] 30 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (5 children)

    My low level group ran across a sleeping gazebo fresh into level 5. Playing a druid my character said that if we didn't do something it'd wake up and begin stalking us. Our 2h fighter melee wanted to try to surprise it with extra attack & action surge. But, our rogue thought we were trying to get him killed (again), then refused. We gave it a wide berth and went on our way. Two sessions later we're ambushed by a gazebo.

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  • [–] 12 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    Sorry ambushed by a what?

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  • [–] 33 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    ED: You see a well groomed garden. In the middle, on a small hill, you see a gazebo.

    ERIC: A gazebo? What color is it?

    ED: [pause] It's white, Eric.

    ERIC: How far away is it?

    ED: About 50 yards.

    ERIC: How big is it?

    ED: [pause] It's about 30 ft across, 15 ft high, with a pointed top.

    ERIC: I use my sword to detect good on it.

    ED: It's not good, Eric. It's a gazebo.

    ERIC: [pause] I call out to it.

    ED: It won't answer. It's a gazebo.

    ERIC: [pause] I sheathe my sword and draw my bow and arrows. Does it respond in any way?

    ED: No, Eric, it's a gazebo!

    ERIC: I shoot it with my bow. [roll to hit] What happened?

    ED: There is now a gazebo with an arrow sticking out of it.

    ERIC: [pause] Wasn't it wounded?

    ED: OF COURSE NOT, ERIC! IT'S A GAZEBO!

    ERIC: [whimper] But that was a +3 arrow!

    ED: It's a gazebo, Eric, a GAZEBO! If you really want to try to destroy it, you could try to chop it with an axe, I suppose, or you could try to burn it, but I don't know why anybody would even try. It's a @#$%!! gazebo!

    ERIC: [long pause. He has no axe or fire spells.] I run away.

    ED: [thoroughly frustrated] It's too late. You've awakened the gazebo. It catches you and eats you.

    ERIC: [reaching for his dice] Maybe I'll roll up a fire-using mage so I can avenge my Paladin.

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