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sometimes means every time (lemmy.world)
submitted 2 years ago by to c/memes@lemmy.world
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[–] 4 points 2 years ago (1 child)

I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD. A temporary period using adderall helped. I think it rewired my brain in a beneficial way. But eventually I quit the adderall.

Long term, the best thing for the my “inability” to focus was finding out what the fuck I truly wanted in my life.

As it turned out, deep dive into what I actually wanted in life revealed some pretty mediocre dreams, some very small stuff, that’s still beyond my grasp.

Men’s work helped me get in touch with my emotions so I could figure out what I wanted in life. It’s not much, but it’s enough to challenge my abilities, and so it’s correctly-shaped to get me moving.

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  • [–] 4 points 2 years ago

    I'm adding to this because I think it came out wrong.

    I'm not using mediocre as a pejorative here. I'm saying that I used to be largely paralyzed by life, and my dreams were huge. For a while my goal was "help humanity expand into the stars". Then it switched to "help humanity survive WW3".

    But lately it's more like "Have enough cash on hand that I can handle two small crises back to back without losing momentum, and then get the emotional benefits from that sense of security" and "Be around people who make me feel valued and respected".

    What I've discovered is that those small dreams motivate me a lot more, because I can actually see how my day to day decisions can affect those things.

    My favorite psychology professor always says that the path out of depression starts with "orienting yourself toward the highest good you can conceive of". At first I thought that meant the loftiest goal I could think of.

    But I realized that while I can say "Help humanity expadn into the stars" I don't have a concrete, solid image of what exactly that means. It's vague. It's not an image; it's just words.

    But those smaller goals, I can actually conceive of them. I can visualize them, and see them concretely. If i try to look higher than that, to my later goals like "having a family" and "being a productive member of the community", I can't see them.

    So this "that you can conceive of" I think it really works best when I think of it as "that I can actually visualize and feel".

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