Everything is fine. Nothing is wrong, there is no war but we are totally winning the war. There is no gas shortage but you should also be more careful with your gas usage and also you should be ok with paying more for gas, what do you want Iran to win the war that isn't happening?

Unabomber's only mistake was targeting people instead of infrastructure

Ok, but what impact does this have on my apes/slurp juices?

Everything under heaven is in utter chaos - the situation is excellent

ty for the explainer