For the mixed size drives, I believe, one of the best options are unRAID and mergerfs with snapraid. Also, if you want to use windows, stablebit drivepool would make it and snapraid can be used for redundancy.
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Have a look at mergerfs. Doesn't give you any redundancy like raid does, but allows you to easily mix, add and remove drives of different sizes. It all depends on your needs, priorities and backup strategie.
Depends on how technical you are and how much time you have.
If I had tons of time to figure it out, I would do a NixOS/bcachefs setup. But I have a high risk tolerance. For most people it probably wouldn't be worth it.
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