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Update 2: Please help, my girlfriend is an ultra! (hexbear.net)
submitted 3 years ago* by to c/chapotraphouse@hexbear.net
19 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

We are still together and things calmed down for a bit. There is now a moratorium on discussing China and we have painted over the Maoist slogans on the walls so my parents could visit without seeing it.

But yesterday I came home and she was outside throwing rocks at birds. I asked why, and she told me "the sparrows are bourgeois". Her victims were pigeons.

After I pointed this out she called me a "lysenkoist". I'm truly at a loss for words here.

all 19 comments

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[–] 2 points 3 years ago (2 children)

thank her for educating the liberalism out of you

then go pick up a rock :mao-aggro-shining:

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  • [–] [S] 1 point 3 years ago (1 child)

    What did the pigeons do to deserve this!?

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  • [–] 2 points 3 years ago

    their crimes are so fowl that no human language can describe them. so multitudinous that even a partial retelling would take the entire lifespan of the universe, birth to death. they keep fucking shitting on my car

    i'm afraid you're just going to have to trust in her superior grasp of theory, comrade. to the killing fields you go!

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    • [–] 2 points 3 years ago

    10/10

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    [–] 2 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    Sounds like she's a keeper

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    • [–] 2 points 3 years ago

    This is so fucking funny lol

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    [–] 2 points 3 years ago (3 children)

    Does your girlfriend have a sister? Asking for a friend

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    • [–] 2 points 3 years ago

    Best bit 2023.

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    [–] 2 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    The sex involves her parading you around the house while naked with insults written on your body and she’s screaming at you for being a right opportunist

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    • [–] 2 points 3 years ago

    "I'm truly at a loss for words here."

    You and me both buddy.

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    [–] 1 point 3 years ago (1 child)

    You need to subject her to a struggle session.

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    • [–] 0 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    Idk whether this is a bit or not

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