One of us could probably put that together pretty quickly lol

But if we did want to build a new distro recommender... Maybe there are like 5 or so questions that would be relevant.

Just off the top of my head some possibilities:

If you're a beginner, Mint is a good choice. One could argue Ubuntu (noobs don't gaf about snap if they even know what it is). I think noobs would want good GUI tools and a very popular, very polished distro. So issues are infrequent but finding answers is easy.

Into gaming? There's a few distros that come up like Nobara. (I've seen Manjaro mentioned but idk).

If you want something that looks kinda like macos there's Endeavor. Does anyone recommend that one these days? I don't usually see it mentioned.

Idk.

You're probably right, an rng that chooses between a few distros might be better lol