this post was submitted on 30 Dec 2023
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Technology

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[–] [email protected] 92 points 10 months ago (7 children)

I'm torn on this topic because on the one hand there's enough evidence for the harm it does, but one thing these finger wagging experts seem to ignore is that if you keep kids isolated from the tools then you're leaving them behind.

I was probably an Internet addict as a kid with dial up and a CRT monitor, but I don't regret it given how well it prepared me for the tech-dominated present.

[–] [email protected] 43 points 10 months ago (2 children)

I'm inclined to agree. I was definitely an internet addict when I was a teenager, but now as a 40 year old, I'm persistently depressed by how many people my age simply cannot use more than the absolute basics of their phone and computer. Like sure, they can send a text and write in a Word document, but become completely paralysed by anything more complicated than that because they're so terrified they'll break something if they click on the wrong button. Those of us that are used to technology have no fear of pressing buttons to find out what they do.

I feel like there ought to be a sensible middle ground somewhere, where kids can be taught how to use the tools they'll be relying on as adults, without exposing them to all the downsides of the internet and exploitative apps.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Yeah, same for me. Now that I'm in the position of raising a kid, I'm not sure how to tackle this.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Give them a raspberry pi with a tiny screen and have them install Linux :)

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Yeah, I'm thinking something along these lines. Offline first.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

I gave my kids phones that have no data plan and are old enough that a lot of stuff just doesn’t work.

They can text and call and use a web browser, but no snapchat, Facebook, Instagram, Telegram or Tiktok. Seems to work well.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 10 months ago

I'm a father of two young kids nowadays, and I also was a teenager in the 90s with internet access when my parents didn't really know what it is.

I think her statement should read "no unrestricted/unlimited smartphone access for children", but I think for a child time limited, guided smartphone access is important - just by letting her use my phone now and then I don't think I'd be able to have her build up the media competency required for not wasting her pocket money on nonsensical predatory games when she's a teenager.

She's 7 now - she generally can chat with a limited amount of people (family members and some friends), make pictures, and request app installation. I'm approving pretty much every free app nowadays - at the beginning I was curating, but we went over game mechanics several times, so she's now recognizing predatory or low effort games herself, and gets rid of them after trying them out. I have my doubts educating a teenager with significantly more technical skills, disagreeing with everything you say, and some ability to throw money at the problem will be as open as her to slowly learning those kind of pitfalls.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)

God I hate "screen time" discourse. Not all activity that happens on a screen is of equivalent value.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Tootally. 95% of smartphone screen time is entertainment or distractions of some form. Not something we (or kids) need to carry around at all times.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago

Dial-up and a CRT implies you had to learn a little bit about computers in order to use them for entertainment. A baby can use a modern smartphone. It's not "preparing" them for anything beides being unable to self-pacify without consumption.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I generally agree. I think there are no great answers, but the expert they interviewed makes good points. The main point that resonates with me is the network effects: if everyone feels pressured to begin using tools because they feel like everyone else is on them, it's very difficult for any parent to constrain their kid's use.

Age prohibitions aren't very restrictive because they're difficult to enforce. They're basically just advice and a legal tool to go after the very most flagrant business targeting minors.

As for the positive effects: that's a great point. I want my kid to have access to explore cyberspace in the same way I want them to have access to explore our city and nearby wildlands. I want them to have as much freedom as possible while teaching them to recognize and avoid danger. I think in all these cases, exposure with supervision before gradually increasing unsupervised access to areas that have become familiar is the only strategy to achieve that that in aware of.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

I will say one thing: my mother didn’t let us have a TV or by extension a nintendo back in the 80s.

Now, as a 41 year old man, I play video games almost every day.

I think it’s connected. If I don’t play video games, I feel like I’m not in control of my life. Having a video game system that I’m allowed to interact with is a part of my sense of accomplishment in the world.

I think they’re related. I don’t blame her at all (not because I don’t think there’s a causal link, but because I think blame is useless).

You make a very good point. It’s super important for kids to be on the same page as their peers.

Ideally no kids would have these things. Kids could bond with each other over the cruelty of the adults depriving them of tech, while growing up with healthy brains.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I think (as with everything) not doing any of the extremes is the way to go.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Nice. Hi! And you seem interested in some of the same stuff. selfhosted, linux, random stuff... not that that's extraordinary here on Lemmy. But maybe you're me from the future... Or I'm your evil twin with a mustache...

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

What, you completely ignore the possibility you're talking to you in another reality?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

I don’t have a mustache, so maybe?