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A good grade at parties (startrek.website)
submitted 2 years ago by to c/risa@startrek.website
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[–] 8 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 child)

Lesson #3456: When making a "joke", any joke, whether it is good or bad and requires the audience to look at something, tell them ...

Look at that! .. you see this .. look at that ... Look ... See this ... Look at that ... Look at that ... You seeing this ... Look at that ... Look ... See it ... Look ... Look at it ... Look

.... even after they have obviously looked at it, you continue pointing and directing their attention ... wrap your arm around their shoulder, get in closer to them and continue telling them ...

Look at that! .. you see this .. look at that ... Look ... See this ... Look at that ... Look at that ... You seeing this ... Look at that ... Look ... See it ... Look ... Look at it ... Look

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  • [–] 8 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Lesson #5357: If there is a large water feature anywhere near the party, find the nearest tall structure and attempt to jump from this high point into the water. Ensure that you announce your actions to as many people as possible before making your attempt. Feasibility, common sense, safety or basic mathematics is not required.

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  • [–] 10 points 2 years ago

    "I've dwelt among the humans. Their entire culture is built around their penises. It's funny to say they are small. It's funny to say they are big. I've been at parties where humans held bottles, pencils, thermoses in front of themselves and called out, 'Hey, look at me. I'm Mr. So-and-So Dick. I've got such-as-such for a penis.' I never saw it fail to get a laugh."

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