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Yeah, it's worse when they aren't doing research. My ex was trying to get a referral to a clinic specializing in a condition she was sure she had so she could get an official diagnosis. Her family doctor kept just saying she didn't have it until one day I went with her and asked him what reasoning he was using to rule it out and he admitted that he wasn't very familiar with it and would read up about it. Her next appointment was a short one because he immediately knew she should be referred after he actually did read about it.
And he's one of the better doctors she's had.
Sounds like that doctor has a bit of an ego too so good for you on challenging him. Ego and profits have no place in healthcare.
There's ego in this but maybe also some sexism, I say this because I have read it mentioned a lot that women have a hard time getting proper diagnosis.
Women and minorities both often aren't taken seriously by patriarchal medical providers. Fortunately, this is being addressed more and more in their education, but it'll take time.
In the US, training for nurse practitioners has incorporated bias awareness and patient-centered care concepts for much longer, so you might bear that in mind when seeking care. Also, for women specifically: you can go to a nurse midwife for general women's health services, not just pregnancy care!
He was a new doctor and I think he was leaning into the whole "it's never lupus" mindset too strongly rather than it being an ego thing.
I feel for you. We went through two negative tests for lupus before it ended up...being lupus.