I am sure there are unfair and ableist situations in meetings. At the same time, organizing meetings must be run somewhat efficiently and safely for everyone involved and it is not inherently ableist to keep things going or cut someone off if they are monopolizing time or trying to start a new topic. The latter is very common and not unique to people with autism by a long shot and one of he more important things to learn about running meetings. Another skill is resisting the urge to hash something out in the whole group and instead putting energy into organizing outside of main meetings. For example, being in leadership of an education committee is far more powerful - and provides opportunitied to really hash things out - than personally raising issues in main meetings on the context. If this organizing-within-an-organization approach is working, and it tends to more often than introducing questions in a big meeting, then the other folks in the committee or who listen to the Ed sessions will actually do the advocacy for you and make it something that needs little discussion since folks are already aligned. I am mentioning all of this not to be lecturing or saying you are doing anything wrong, but instead because I think it is generally useful advice and because I certainly have to personally resist the urge to correct or clarify during meetings lol.

But just to be clear I am talking about organizing spaces with an agenda, not just casual conversation. When you mentioned, "get caught up in the technical def of a word to the point of talking in circles, even if the basic premise is agreed upon" it made me think of meetings getting derailed but you may be thinking of something totally different.