I'm so sorry for what you and your family had to go through. I can empathize with the notion of being completely let down by supposed modern medical practitioners. I've lost someone close to me because a doctor (and her staff and associates) did not catch an error in proscribed/administered medication. At the end of the day, these vitally important systems are susceptible to human error, and it costs some people everything. I see and hear you -- perhaps only because it happened to me as well; it feels like no one else could ever really know -- but I do know what it's like to feel like the only system available has utterly failed you.

We are all we have, each of us individually. I hope the best for you and those you hold dear.