Honey, I'm a veteran of the early internet, my first computer was a fucking Tandy. That's why, after I matured a little, I decided seeing this kind of shit wasn't some test of fortitude I was winning and likely it just wasn't doing my mental health any favors.
Sounds like it didn't do you any either.
If you don't think raping an animal likely to death is horrifying, you should really consider what the internet has done to your brain, dude.