Been thinking about a monitor upgrade... I should get on that if they're going the way of TVs. Any recommendations that don't have all this shit?

I've been using the same monitors for... holy shit, like almost two decades. One was a Goodwill trash purchase to use as a secondary, the other was a highschool graduation gift. Highschool. I barely even remember highschool at this point. Anyway, they're showing their age. And I'm way out of touch with what specs to shoot for, or what they even mean. I need a 'For Idiots' guide to this shit.