I'm at a friend's place and the cat keeps bringing in dead (or half-dead) animals into the house. It's my understanding that cats think we are big, helpless kittens that don't know how to hunt. Hence, they think they are doing us a favour.

It seems like a few mice actually escaped and found refuge in some walls in the house, so these "presents" are actually more than just annoying (and smelly if the dead animal ends up behind the couch).

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] 2 points 2 months ago (1 child)

You come to me in my house on the day that my daughter is to puke in the clean laundry, and ask me not to do murder?

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 2 points 2 months ago (1 child)

    Well there are worse bodily ececrements she could do on the clean laundry...

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago (1 child)

    I was gonna say "spray" but figured people would be like "why isn't your cat fixed??"

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago (2 children)

    Two girls. Both missing their ovaries and uterus. And a boy with a suspiciously empty sac. I'm no detective, but it seems weird.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago (1 child)

    Would that count as a ma(l)e(ca)t ball(s) sub?

    Yes it isn't spelled right but it's so close to an excellent pun I had to do it

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago (1 child)

    I t(h)ought I w(a)s (ha)ving (a) stroke

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago (2 children)

    Sorry, I didn't know how else to show dropping letters...

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago (1 child)

    Oh and I just realized I did it backwards, lmao

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago (1 child)

    It was a poor attempt at meat ball sub... Like the sandwich...

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago

    Bro, I got your joke. That's why I responded with my own, making sure to indicate the letters h-a-h-a-a, spelling out "hahaa." When doing so, I did the pattern in the reverse order that you did- so instead of putting the dropped letters in parentheses, I put the hahaa in the parentheses.

  • source
  • parent