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The Dreams of Printers (thelemmy.club)
submitted 8 months ago by to c/curatedtumblr@sh.itjust.works
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waterandsilver: crazy how the printer is the only piece of tech that acts up like that almost every day of its life. and we just accept it. water and silver: i don't think i've ever met a printer that actually wanted to be a printer. i think most printers have dreams of being on the stage. in-the-drowning-deep: I met a printer early in my IT career that did not want to be a printer. it sat in a school reprographics room, sullenly chewing any job it was fed - if it deigned to notice them at all. then one day, a miracle occurred. an exhausted physics teacher, instead of punching in 12 for the number of copies she wanted of the 30-page booklet she had made for her A-level physics class, punched in 1200. and that printer camt o life. this print job was its moment, its magnum opus! it WOULD NOT be parted from it, no matter what we did, until we physically unplugged it from the wall, by which time it had printed almost 200 copies. moral of the story: no printer wants to be a printer unless you also do not want it to be a printer for a bit. netherworldpost: printers do not want to be printers because they want to be problems
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[–] 39 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (3 children)

Printers exist to spite you. They are chaotic machines.

I thought it was just me. Finding out as I progress in IT, no. They're all cunts.

And if the printers are listening you're not a cunt. (Please keep working)

Edit: they fucking heard. The admin sharp gave me so much trouble today. Work on one machine not on another. Generic error. Adding via IP or wifi or wired. Im sorry printers I didn't mean it. Y r u this way

Edit 2: it was the port

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  • [–] 19 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    When I started in Desktop Support my super power was equipment suddenly working when I showed up. I used to joke that it was because they were afraid of me, and even printers stopped acting up eventually.

    I like to think that they could sense that I wouldn't hesitate to go all Office Space on them.

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  • [–] 11 points 8 months ago

    The first printer that made me audibly yell "what the fuck" was a Konica Minolta. Not because it was actually malfunctioning, but because of the absolute clusterfuck that is the settings page on its web-server.

    They very clearly want you to pay them for either management software or maintenance.

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