▲ 609 ▼ Conditional Baptism (lemmy.zip) submitted 1 year ago by Maven@lemmy.zip to c/programmer_humor@programming.dev 43 comments fedilink hide all child comments
[–] theneverfox@pawb.social 6 points 1 year ago (9 children) Can you get more clean than clean? Numbers are a human thing. The universe don't care permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 9 child comments replies: [–] _stranger_@lemmy.world 22 points 1 year ago (3 children) I imagine if baptisms stacked, you could pile on a gazillion of them like ablative armor against incoming sin. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 3 child comments replies: [–] theneverfox@pawb.social 9 points 1 year ago (1 child) Lol, imagine if showers stacked. You could spend a week showering and then all filth just disappears when it touches you But then, what happens to the filth? The only way I see this working is if you shower, you just continuously wash filth off yourself. But then does it all just kick in when you walk out of the shower? Or maybe, you never become clean until you've washed a lifetime of filth off yourself, then you're clean forever I'm imagining every baby just covered in sludge, and after years of washing they become clean. Imagine your kid just never gets cleaner, and everyone just thinks you're a terrible parent. Imagine cleaning your kid and they become clean way ahead of schedule There's some real existential horror here permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 1 child comment replies: [–] ulterno@programming.dev 1 point 1 year ago In reality, if you bathe too much you just stand to lose too much sebum, making it easier for dirt to stick to your skin (and harder to remove) until the layer forms again. permalink fedilink source parent [–] NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago* Incoming baptismal penetration estimate from carnal sins: -17 layers Shield integrity: 69% Hull integrity: 100% System: stable permalink fedilink source parent [–] Gutek8134@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (2 children) I think erasing one's body could make you more clean than clean permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 year ago (1 child) So what you're saying is that fundies need to be cremated? Possibly AFTER death from other causes? permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 1 child comment replies: [–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago no no. they need to switch to Flouroantimonic acid instead of just flowing water. permalink fedilink source parent [–] vithigar@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 year ago Conceptual numeracy is a human thing. The universe absolutely cares about quantifiable physical properties which we represent as numbers. permalink fedilink source parent [–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 year ago Numbers are a human thing. The universe don't care Doubly so with religion, though 🤷 permalink fedilink source parent
[–] _stranger_@lemmy.world 22 points 1 year ago (3 children) I imagine if baptisms stacked, you could pile on a gazillion of them like ablative armor against incoming sin. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 3 child comments replies: [–] theneverfox@pawb.social 9 points 1 year ago (1 child) Lol, imagine if showers stacked. You could spend a week showering and then all filth just disappears when it touches you But then, what happens to the filth? The only way I see this working is if you shower, you just continuously wash filth off yourself. But then does it all just kick in when you walk out of the shower? Or maybe, you never become clean until you've washed a lifetime of filth off yourself, then you're clean forever I'm imagining every baby just covered in sludge, and after years of washing they become clean. Imagine your kid just never gets cleaner, and everyone just thinks you're a terrible parent. Imagine cleaning your kid and they become clean way ahead of schedule There's some real existential horror here permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 1 child comment replies: [–] ulterno@programming.dev 1 point 1 year ago In reality, if you bathe too much you just stand to lose too much sebum, making it easier for dirt to stick to your skin (and harder to remove) until the layer forms again. permalink fedilink source parent [–] NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago* Incoming baptismal penetration estimate from carnal sins: -17 layers Shield integrity: 69% Hull integrity: 100% System: stable permalink fedilink source parent
[–] theneverfox@pawb.social 9 points 1 year ago (1 child) Lol, imagine if showers stacked. You could spend a week showering and then all filth just disappears when it touches you But then, what happens to the filth? The only way I see this working is if you shower, you just continuously wash filth off yourself. But then does it all just kick in when you walk out of the shower? Or maybe, you never become clean until you've washed a lifetime of filth off yourself, then you're clean forever I'm imagining every baby just covered in sludge, and after years of washing they become clean. Imagine your kid just never gets cleaner, and everyone just thinks you're a terrible parent. Imagine cleaning your kid and they become clean way ahead of schedule There's some real existential horror here permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 1 child comment replies: [–] ulterno@programming.dev 1 point 1 year ago In reality, if you bathe too much you just stand to lose too much sebum, making it easier for dirt to stick to your skin (and harder to remove) until the layer forms again. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] ulterno@programming.dev 1 point 1 year ago In reality, if you bathe too much you just stand to lose too much sebum, making it easier for dirt to stick to your skin (and harder to remove) until the layer forms again. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago* Incoming baptismal penetration estimate from carnal sins: -17 layers Shield integrity: 69% Hull integrity: 100% System: stable permalink fedilink source parent
[–] Gutek8134@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (2 children) I think erasing one's body could make you more clean than clean permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 year ago (1 child) So what you're saying is that fundies need to be cremated? Possibly AFTER death from other causes? permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 1 child comment replies: [–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago no no. they need to switch to Flouroantimonic acid instead of just flowing water. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 year ago (1 child) So what you're saying is that fundies need to be cremated? Possibly AFTER death from other causes? permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 1 child comment replies: [–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago no no. they need to switch to Flouroantimonic acid instead of just flowing water. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago no no. they need to switch to Flouroantimonic acid instead of just flowing water. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] vithigar@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 year ago Conceptual numeracy is a human thing. The universe absolutely cares about quantifiable physical properties which we represent as numbers. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 year ago Numbers are a human thing. The universe don't care Doubly so with religion, though 🤷 permalink fedilink source parent