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[+] 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (14 children)
  • Nope. Nobody "has it all together". As per SituationCake, you deal with the most urgent dumpster first. Then other shit as it happens. Helps to have a rough idea of routine and priorities - which can be varied in accordance with circumstances. There is no law that states that THOU SHALT HAVE AN IMMACULATE HOME AT ALL TIMES OF EVERY DAY OR I WILL SMITE YOU. And nobody ever put "I was a perfect housekeeper" on their gravestone. Kids/pets come first if there's a scheduling conflict, closely followed by partner. Everything else can usually wait a bit if necessary.

    My own very rough schedule as a solo household is : I budget 15 mins for washing up & kitchen clean per day. This is not optional for me as I'm immunocompromised post cancer treatment and well, microbiology. Laundry once a week (mostly) depending on weather. Rest of house - I budget 2 hours on a weekend for tidy up and cleaning. That's housework sorted mostly. Maybe do a more thorough clean at the change of season. Life is too short to wipe the top of cupboards or clean behind the fridge more than 4 times a year imo. For me, Saturdays are a write off anyway as I have to take an osteoporosis pill weekly that screws me over for most of the day (gotta stay within 30 seconds of the loo), so I might as well stay home and sort the house on that day. Maybe do some slow cooking if I can be bothered. Ditto gardening. Most of my friends are trained now and know that I'm not available on Saturdays for socialising.
    Sundays are my fun days - I try to keep that day free to do pretty much whatever I want or see people etc.
    Shopping : once a week for pantry/fridge. And stop on the way home after work for fresh stuff if needed.
    Life admin : 1 hour once a month copes with most things. Or deal as they come up.
    Cooking : breakfast isn't really cooking unless you do eggs etc., so cooking is roughly 1 hour at the endish of the day. During the week I keep it very simple. A bit more lavish on the weekend - say 2 hours for 3 mealsworth. After dinner is relax/chill/net time or reading or hobbies.

    Take home message - it all depends on circumstances. And nobody gets it all done all the time. And if they did, I would consider them to be robot aliens from a distant planet with good connections to the cosmetic and AI industries.

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  • [–] 4 points 1 year ago*

    I struggle to do it all. Especially living alone with cooking and housework - if I don't do it, it doesn't get done. Feels like I'm on the go every day and often just treading water. Prioritising is the only tactic I have to manage.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago

    I think the 80/20 rule can lighten this mood. The theory that you get 80% of the result from 20% of the effort. Kids are a unique responsibility... To some parents. But the rest of the stuff, you don't have to be perfect, but put some effort in. A bit of exercise, a reasonable diet, a job you don't hate that pays enough. What gets marketed is people living perfect lives, the reality is few people have the energy or discipline to squeeze every moment.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

    You’re not meant to have to do it all alone. Usually there would have been a stay at home spouse, a multigenerational household and/or a support system

    Edit: I’m chipping away at things in chunks but I’m not on top of everything either. Obviously the needs of my pet take priority, then mine, and everything is prioritised after that.

    I chunk her twice daily meds in with her breakfast and supper, that really helps.

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