I work in 911 dispatch

Back when I was still in training I delivered my first baby, was damn glad to still have my trainer hanging out over my shoulder for that.

It was almost a perfectly by the book, no complications delivery

Except that they had their doula on another line giving competing instructions to me.

In general unless there are complications, our instructions are pretty much the classic birth position, woman on her back, knees bent, legs spread

And the doula had her on all fours, which is something we instruct for certain complications

But again, everything they were telling me was that there were no complications.

So eventually I basically had to say something like "our instructions are to have her on her back, I can't make you listen to me, but I have to give these instructions, so I'm going to proceed as if she's on her back"

Phrased maybe a bit more diplomatically

I have no idea what position she was actually in when the baby finally popped out, but he was healthy, so that's all that matters I suppose.

And they made me do a photo op with the parents and baby. I don't like babies. Not much of a fan of having my picture taken either. Not my favorite day at work. I'd rather take a call for a shooting. No one makes you take a picture with a shooting victim.