Yeah, definitely I think it is better to have the defederation tools per user instead of per instance, or even if an instance decide to defederate from another one let the user override this change.

Also about moving across the instances this would be nice when it is officially supported (or the third party tools to work better) to migrate from one instance to another.

You are right about Lemmy/Kbin being in a so early state compared with almost anything, but I'm glad it is growing so fast (we know why) I definitely see myself being around here for a long time.