65
submitted 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago) by charonn0@startrek.website to c/dull_mens_club@lemmy.world

I cleaned out the junk drawer and found a bunch of Starbucks gift cards that I've received for various reasons over the past 15 years. I used one from 2015 today and the barista was mildly surprised and asked where I got such an old-style card. So I told him about the junk drawer.

[-] charonn0@startrek.website 1 points 13 hours ago

To be fair, there are important differences between open source and closed source software.

[-] charonn0@startrek.website 11 points 2 days ago

You vastly underestimate the number of roadside tourist traps.

[-] charonn0@startrek.website 4 points 3 days ago

Wait, that's not how you spell "dumbening".

[-] charonn0@startrek.website 25 points 4 days ago

I once blew a coworker's mind with Alt-Tab.

[-] charonn0@startrek.website 1 points 5 days ago

Are the mashed potatoes buttered, or plain?

[-] charonn0@startrek.website 1 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

I started using a white noise machine and fans on high when I lived down the block from a hospital emergency room. It sounded like a jet engine in my bedroom, but my brain learned to interpret the white noise as profound silence. I moved away from the hospital zone but still use the white noise to sleep.

[-] charonn0@startrek.website 9 points 5 days ago

Everyone knows that foods are extended along the axis with a circular cross section.

i.e., burgers stack higher, hot dogs grow longer.

[-] charonn0@startrek.website 9 points 6 days ago

Ironically, billionaires probably do worry about money a lot. Just not in the same way everyone else does.

[-] charonn0@startrek.website 2 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

You are technically correct. The best kind of correct.

[-] charonn0@startrek.website 5 points 6 days ago

Also, sliding around pretending to ice skate.

11
105
7

The tame tank would randomly appear in lieu of a regular tank. This tank is not aggro to the survivors unless they shoot him first.

He does still charge toward the survivors, but only because he's so pleased to see them. This unfortunately is indistinguishable from regular aggro tank behavior, making it hard for survivors to know.

If he manages to get close to the survivors without being aggro'd then he'll just stand there chilling with his new friends, roaring in happiness.

In cases where two tanks spawn and one is tame, tame tank will attack aggro tank to protect the survivors. Insert confused aggro tank noises here.

If the survivors manage not to aggro the tame-tank and the escape vehicle arrives, they take the tank with them and name him Keith.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

2

Mercy Hospital construction area. Using a propane tank to stumble the tank off of the side.

2
76
It finally happened (thelemmy.club)

This is the one at MedTek, not the one in Nuka World that always works. Only took 2,555.6 hours of playtime over 11 years.

303
167
submitted 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) by charonn0@startrek.website to c/sciencefiction@lemmy.world

I've been listening to X-Minus-One episodes for the last few days and am really starting to appreciate the radio play format. Some of the stories are pretty dated, being from the 40's and 50's, but a lot of them still hold up if you're a little forgiving on the science details.

417
Not like that! (crazypeople.online)
32
Wife trouble (startrek.website)

A man wakes up with a hangover after a night of drinking. He doesn't even remember how he got home, and is worried that his wife will be mad.

The first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose.

He sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all cleaned and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling!"

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper.

His 16 year old son is also at the table, eating. He asks, "Son, what happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3AM, drunk out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door."

Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"

His son replies, "Oh THAT... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, 'Leave me alone, lady, I'm a married man!'"

29
Two hunters (startrek.website)

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed.

The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

The operator says, "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There is a silence; then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "OK, now what?"

[-] charonn0@startrek.website 270 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Just don't buy stuff you don't need. 100% savings every time.

view more: next ›

charonn0

0 post score
0 comment score
joined 2 years ago
MODERATOR OF
l4d