An absolutely horrific event is ripping its way through a daycare chain in my state, which is owned by private equity. The event is so horrific and tragic that I don't even want to link it, not even because it would dox myself; it's just too fucking sad.

When we first enrolled our oldest into this daycare center, private equity did not own it. By the time she was 4, they did. The experience she got was worlds different from the one my son is getting, and this company has been gobbling up daycares across my state. This has culminated in such a lax hiring policy that some freak was able to...

I want to be clear: The above did not happen in my son's daycare, but it is part of that chain of daycares. There are now up to 10 lawsuits from families against the parent company. Some of which are claiming that staff members tried to alert daycare administration about the behavior of this person, only to be retaliated against. I have no idea if DCF was contacted at any point over this persons activity, but daycare workers in my state are mandated reporters.

Since this event, our daycare has been hemorrhaging both leadership and rank-and-file daycare teachers. The crop of people left now are mostly the "seasonal" college students who rotate through the facility every year as the semesters open and close.

Speaking with a former teacher we're close with, we were told that the new leadership in the building is constantly watching the security cameras and issuing retaliatory action against anyone speaking poorly of the facility. One parent relayed to me that in conversation with one of the teachers (a former high school teacher), they learned she has reported our facility to the state five times in the last few months. For things as bad as leaving a child in a diaper for 6+ hours without changing them, as an example.

In our experience, it's apparent that our son has not gotten the same level of care as our daughter once did. They used to focus on social and emotional learning, teaching kids how to regulate their emotions. They used to tell us when they had to put this teaching into practice and why, so we understood how to implement it at home and what she was struggling with. They taught our daughter sign language when she was around 2 years old. They claimed to be doing this with my son, but never did. Likewise, they were far more supportive when potty training, something my son is just getting to the other side of now. Multiple times in the last month he has either come home with a pullup on under his training underwear or skid marks in his underwear. It dawned on me just this week that they must not be watching him or keeping tabs on him in the bathroom... I'm now making a more explicit effort to coach him through wiping after pooping and other good bathroom habits, which I have a strong feeling they are not doing when he is there.

All of this is a result of high turnover. They cannot keep people in the facility at all, and there are so few faces now that I even recognize. The teacher we spoke with told us that it used to be practice that new hires were interviewed by the building director. Now, when people are hired, they are hired by a 3rd party, and no one in the building meets with them before hand.

Most of what I'm telling you is things we picked up on over the past few months but had no connecting thread for. Day to day, some of this stuff just slips past you, or presents like a one-off incident. You get caught up in the day-to-day process. But the conversations with the other parent we're friends with, and this former teacher, though, stitched all these things together in a way that weaved a sad and concerning tapestry of life at our daycare. One that has been declining since before this incident in the other facility.

People will look at what is happening in the daycare at the center of this atrocity and view it as an isolated tragedy and not for what it is, a systemic failure of kids. Private equity doesn't give a shit that these kids and families will be lifelong victims. They will do everything possible to try to protect their assets, their franchise, and their brand name, even if doing so costs them all of that eventually. They'll take their losses, rebrand, merge, and split, but they'll continue to ruin the lives of children.

The part that has me so incensed is the centerlessness of the whole thing. This person is going to spend a long time in jail, but they are not the reason my daycare center is sinking. Private equity is, and there is no one single person you could accost. Just this faceless entity systematically allowing for the ruination of people's kids. Cut the head off it, and it grows another; it keeps lurching forward like a fucking zombie, turning daycares into more private equity. Destroy it, and two more rise in its place. Seek shelter from it, and it subsumes that shelter.

The entire thing is a fucking tragedy. Getting my kid into a different daycare is necessary at this point, but I know it's also going to be sad for him. I have to pull him away from all the friends he knows and people he likes. In theory, it's only for a year, since he should be able to get into Pre-K in my local district. That, however, is run on a lottery system because the district is intent on leaving the program underfunded. Even though they have the physical capacity for it. That's a whole other grievance I have for another time though. I'm sad for him and how this is going to impact him.

I just needed to get this out of me. It's been eating me up for days.