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Constructive Criticism: A Handbook Speaking & Listening More Effectively in Personal Relations, Groups, & Political Activities By Vicki Legion (Gracie Lyons), 1976

Constructive Criticism is a wonderful example of the blending of valuable and powerful socialist theory with a practical, down-to-earth pragmatism. The result is an extremely useful manual for people who work together for positive social change. Putting Gracie Lyon's suggestions into practice will increase the power of people's work as well as their personal sense of well being and satisfaction.

eBook: https://www.marxists.org/history/erol/ncm-3/constructive-criticism.html

PDF: https://frauenkultur.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/Constructive-Criticism.pdf

Audiobook: https://youtu.be/rvTByQIQAxQ

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[-] free_casc@hexbear.net 30 points 4 days ago

I do think this community needs a bit of a cultural revolution for its own good. It wouldnt hurt to slap this image around more often, I think the guidelines are really good.

The "dirtbag left" is dead, and "bullying works" should have always had ROEs. I do think there is going to be a socdem future for the western left, and instead of being mad about all the liberal bullshit that's going to happen, it is far better to encourage that growth. This does not mean "vote blue no matter who", or forgiving accountability to the socdems when they lib out.

Take the Michael Brooks approach: "be kind to people and hostile to systems".


A historical materialist analysis should make it clear that "very cool revolutionary shit" is not gonna happen in highly industrialized economies (maybe the West isn't "highly industrialized" right now? Open to that discussion). The priority needs to be for the imperial interests of the West/US to collapse and/or contract as much as possible so that decolonial movements can flourish.

The US civil rights movement is likely the template that will need to be followed in the information age. A massive anti-racist/Anti-imperial/pro-social juste/etc... movement led by true Democratic Socialists with a smaller militant movement working in parallel. This movement will need to grow until it can force institutions to react, and channel public opinion toward supporting militant action when it responds to institutional failure to respond to the demands. The DemSoc side can also organize labor action, and build class consciousness that way too. I think a primitive version of this is happening right now in the Palestinian liberation movement, far less organized but the mechanics are similar. I think institutions will be forced to respond in the upcoming election cycle (which will prove my hypothesis right or wrong).

I don't think it is possible in the west to somehow build a revolutionary movement without a large social democratic (demsoc if we get lucky) movement working in tandem. I also think the revolutionary movement will play an important role, but is unlikely to be successful in its objectives.

This doesn't mean all is lost for the left, it doesn't mean that we should simply "redistribute the imperial spoils more fairly" and call it good, my intent is to angle for the most effective tactic to build the global socialist movement from my position on empire-occupied Salish/Chinook/etc land. It is a dialectical process, and while I understand the "rage against the machine", I think it needs to be chanelled into productive political organizing at every level rather than beating up on people for being wrong online.

There are many members of this community who forget to be hopeful for a better future, and I think we are in the darkest times right now, every day will be brighter from here (unless the US cancels elections, then global left might actually be fucked)

[-] MemesAreTheory@hexbear.net 13 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Repost the image often! I'm not sure I agree with you every step along the chain there, it starts to sound like entryism to me which I do think is a failed project. But the wider accessibility and popularity of even succdem politics would be more fertile ground for organizing than a bunch of scared libs still reacting to the very whiff of red-scare triggers, so I do think it's important to find patience and tolerance for those who, if nothing else, at least want good things for people. My critique of entryism or succdem politics is that it cannot succeed against motivated resistance from capital, and that entails more radical action will be necessary. Many people are going to have to see or experience that failure first hand before they get on board, though, so no sense in alienating them in the meantime.

[-] free_casc@hexbear.net 8 points 4 days ago

Appreciate the constructive reply! From what you wrote I think we agree on many of the main points.

I would clarify by saying that I also reject entryism into wholly liberal institutions like the Democratic Party, however I think there is value in the growth of flawed organizations like the DSA. Like you said people need to see it fail, just like many of us watched Bernie go down in flames when he had all the momentum with him. Learning from theory is great, but learning from practice is even better.

[-] MemesAreTheory@hexbear.net 8 points 4 days ago

For sure. All the Lenin posting on Chapo in the wake of Super Tuesday literally was watershed moment for me. I had to see it in real time for the message to sink in, for the theory to finally click and prove itself: the ruling class would rather have fascism than even the most sensible and mildest of succdem reforms.

[-] Awoo@hexbear.net 11 points 4 days ago

I'm extremely happy to educate and be constructive but it always comes with important caveats. A person must be willing to learn, if they're not willing to learn you can not have a constructive conversation with them. This doesn't have to be blind agreement, sometimes it can be just sheer curiosity as to how someone can have the views that we do, how those views can be so incredibly different to their own and a real honest inquiry into how we arrived at them.

If a person doesn't have that then I give them the most negative experience I can give them so that when they come to the next leftist they reconsider their approach to that leftist and this next comrade gets a person who is willing to have a more honest conversation. In essence, setting up the next person. I find the sheer aggression I have can sometimes inspire some people to try a curious tone on the spot, if not the person I was talking to then someone else will interjet with a more useful tone for conversation and I will change my behaviour immediately to one that speaks eloquently and is clearly capable of deep conversation to generate more curiosity about how passionately angry and rude I was moments before.

It's quite a deliberate act and not my usual daily character because you don't get the same problems in person that you do in text, I can carry a conversation in a totally different way in person. Online I have a very specific goal in interactions and it's to get to a useful conversational tone for the other side to actually learn something instead of having 100 anti-tankie barriers between me and anything that resembles an original thought in their head.

[-] free_casc@hexbear.net 7 points 4 days ago

Yeah what you said makes sense to me

What I see happening on this site is that any take that is less than the most radical position available will very often be at risk of ridicule or hostility right off the bat, even among long time members of the community who are operating off of a similar set of information.

A prominent example of this I notice in Mamdani threads where a bunch of users want to snap off a "fell for it again award" at the earliest possible opportunity. It has sometimes been thrown at other site users with a strawman of "you really thought he was going to be the next Lenin but you were wrong! [Idiot!]“. For some it is important to demonstrate that they are the leftest leftist in the room, rather than have a nuanced discussion. This turns existing users away from our community.

Another example occurs when people, usually on federated accounts, post something ignorant compared to the Hexbear party line. I notice that some people are quick to post ppb at the first opportunity and demean their thinking, rather than offer them an opportunity to engage with something that is more developed (further to the left). I think we should hesitate until they really demonstrate obstinance, maybe even offering two chances to show a willingness to engage before going in with the dogpile. This eagerness to dunk turns away prospective users (which is a problem because the userbase has been contracting for quite some time).

Based on what you wrote, I don't think you are part of the problem.

[-] Awoo@hexbear.net 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I definitely come across aggressive at times. But it's always a very calculated kind. I'm not one to just be that way for the sake of it, I have a reason and a purpose in doing it. It's carrot and stick at a holistic level where I acknowledge to myself I am not the only leftist a person is going to speak to in their lives. If I can't get through to someone, then my goal is to make it so that the next leftist doesn't get the same interaction I just had. We are collectively a team and we can think of our engagement with others as passing on the baton, if a conversation is not ideal it is possible to help the next leftist have a better setup. Even in some cases if I have to take the fall and look bad to achieve it.

[-] test_@hexbear.net 5 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I've had success shaming people into submission (not on hexbear), for me the trick was to not directly insult their intelligence or inherent character, but only attack their views or attitude, and strictly along moral lines, not "does it make sense or not" which is just an indirect insult. People will take a lot of abuse as long as you don't call them an idiot

[-] Awoo@hexbear.net 5 points 3 days ago

People will take a lot of abuse as long as you don't call them an idiot

Yes I am fond of this. I'm particularly fond of pointing out that I think a person is smarter than they pretend to be on the internet. A lot of people say really stupid things to hold on to something they want to argue, when they are not in fact stupid people but are simply in the reddit debate pervert mindset. The things they say are ridiculous, they themselves are usually quite able to see how ridiculous the things they say are too. It's possible to be a flatterer while also attacking.

[-] queermunist@lemmy.ml 32 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

I try to engage with liberal progressives as if I am engaging with my own younger self, because I was one of them 10 years ago.

That doesn't necessarily mean being nice, because niceness wasn't what convinced me, but it means being patient and fair.

[-] Wertheimer@hexbear.net 16 points 4 days ago

I wince whenever I accidentally do this, from Francois Truffaut’s breakup with Jean-Luc Godard: “Anyone who has a different opinion from yours is a creep, even if the opinion you hold in June is not the same one you held in April.”

[-] quarrk@hexbear.net 15 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

There’s an effort post I want to write eventually. I haven’t yet, partly because I worry it is too trite, and partly because I’m not certain about where to place the emphasis.

Marx summarized it well:

“Mankind thus inevitably sets itself only such tasks as it is able to solve, since closer examination will always show that the problem itself arises only when the material conditions for its solution are already present or at least in the course of formation.”

The premise of the post I want to make is the relative importance of, on the one hand, critique and understanding of what is given, capitalist society; and on the other hand, construction of a totally new thing.

Because the critique forms the necessary basis of the construction, most of the effort reasonably goes into the former. But culturally the latter is almost absent at least in the western leftist spaces. Maybe people are so afraid of utopianism that they forget that the point is to build things.

Marx’s statement is a truism about social psychology. The masses intuitively understand that they are exploited, even if obfuscated through contradictory liberal frameworks. The mechanics of exploitation are relevant only to a leftist who has already committed to learning. The missing ingredient is the concrete alternative. When an alternative gains reality in the mind of the average person, then revolution ceases to be theoretical. It becomes a question not of abstract possibility but of will.

Edit: adding what I wrote in a separate reply

Books like Constructive Criticism are exactly what is necessary for those who want to build. How can communists have any credibility or authority to speak on societal change, if they cannot work out how to change themselves? By improving our selves as individuals, with conscious intentionality as described in Theses on Feuerbach, we demonstrate that concrete alternative I alluded to in the previous comment. The point of this development is not for moral high ground, but to shatter the distinction between the theoretical and the practical.

[-] quarrk@hexbear.net 6 points 3 days ago

For conciseness I’ll write how this relates to the OP as a reply comment.

Books like Constructive Criticism are exactly what is necessary for those who want to build. How can communists have any credibility or authority to speak on societal change, if they cannot work out how to change themselves? By improving our selves as individuals, with conscious intentionality as described in Theses on Feuerbach, we demonstrate that concrete alternative I alluded to in the previous comment. The point of this development is not for moral high ground, but to shatter the distinction between the theoretical and the practical.

[-] SchillMenaker@hexbear.net 5 points 3 days ago

Marx probably isn't our guy to extol the virtues of kind and constructive responses. Man was an old school poster.

[-] quarrk@hexbear.net 3 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I would not equate constructiveness and kindness. Marx’s polemics were usually justified and served a practical end. The vulgar ideas of Proudhon and dozens of others posed a significant danger for the working class and had to be destroyed in the public intellectual sphere.

In direct personal collaboration, such as his party work, I’m certain that Marx was effective at finding unity while highlighting differences of principle when it was absolutely necessary. The drafting of the Manifesto is one example, because in that, Marx and Engels managed to unify a whole range of socialists to speak with one voice and one mass line, while not compromising on principle.

You also find in Marx’s work a remarkable willingness to credit ideas to even the smallest intellectuals if they were the first to speak them. He cared about tracing an idea historically, showing how ideas “bubble up” through a social-historical process of collective understanding, emanating from a material basis. For this reason he wrote thousands of pages critiquing the political economists, not to be a “poster” but because in their work he saw the expression of that social process. Marx preserves quite a lot from Smith and Ricardo for example. His method is quite dialectical in the Hegelian sense really, advancing the concepts by pushing them to contradiction, and through speculation both preserving and destroying the prior understanding.

[-] SchillMenaker@hexbear.net 2 points 3 days ago

I would not equate constructiveness and kindness.

I wouldn't either, which is why I don't think a Marx quote moves the ball down the field in a discussion about kindness. I could be wrong, but the first line in the meme is "Not everything needs a response" and I get the impression that Marx was absolutely not that guy.

I do recognize that it's more that you've got an idea brewing and had an opportunity to feel it out rather than it being a response specifically tailored to the topic at hand. I don't think anything you said is wrong, just not super applicable.

[-] quarrk@hexbear.net 3 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I wrote about the purpose of self-improvement from a Marxist standpoint, primarily in response to the book that was advertised, that book being explicitly Marxist-Leninist. The applicability of Marx is self-evident. I wrote a separate reply comment, so maybe the relevance wasn’t that clear, that’s my bad in that case.

Besides the book, the meme is about communication between comrades. It is not a Christian “turn the other cheek” message that says kindness is in itself a virtue no matter who and where. Marx was excellent at polemic, and in my opinion it was constructive that he offered many useful refutations of common vulgar-socialist ideas, let alone bourgeois vulgar economy.

In general I don’t think it is true that Marx tore down comrades over nothing. I think you are repeating a meme about a perceived pettiness, for example in his attacks on Proudhon. But firstly Proudhon was not a comrade, secondly his ideas absolutely had to be dismantled, both for the working class and for Marx’s own theoretical clarification.

[-] Juice@midwest.social 17 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

I think if youre reading this and have not read Constructive Criticism, you should read it now. Skip the first section if you wanna get right to the meat, but the first section is historically interesting, but also repetitive and dogmatic.

And, read the manga! Non-Violent Communication by Dr. Marshall Rosenberg. Legion's work is based on it as she was Rosenberg's personal assistant.

NVC is a kind of communication that is developed to fix broken relationships, rather than being a set of word tricks, it is a way of explaining our own subjective experience concretely (not confusing it with objective observations, also not confusing different kinds of observations), and luring out the subjective experience of others, like helping them articulate their true feelings, thoughts and observations in a concrete way. The two works are complementary to each other, Rosenberg's framings and exercises imo do a better job at describing the fundamental concepts and practices, while being a little too light on political difference. Legion's continuation includes a long l, imo skippable, introduction to western academic new-left Dialectical Materialism primer, that reads like a "how to get your book published by the CCP during the cultural revolution as a late 60's American ML/Maoist."

But her practical manual is absolutely required reading, and has been making its way into the intro reading lists of national orgs, branches, chapters, all over. NVC is a fundamentally dialectical-materialist method of comms, albeit one with its class analysis carefully manicured. Fortunately, there was, at the closest levels of collaboration, an excellent contribution to both the Marxism and NVC.

[-] MemesAreTheory@hexbear.net 9 points 4 days ago

Hey thanks for writing a serious endorsement/review, complete with an acknowledgement of what might be a weak or skippable section. I hope others find it compelling in a way that a (semi-serious)shit post can't be.

[-] Pentacat@hexbear.net 3 points 4 days ago

NVC is a great recommendation. I need to get back in the practice. I haven’t read Legion, so I’m going to check that out.

[-] test_@hexbear.net 16 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Good thread

Another rule of thumb: it's good to give people an out, i.e., be respectful and charitable enough that they can leave the conversation at any time without feeling they need to defeat you to save face. It's as much for your own sake as theirs. If they feel like they have to defend themself by attacking you, then suddenly you're in the same position of having to defend yourself and no one has an off ramp.

Sometimes easier said than done, but it's never too late to deescalate even if it does start to get heated. It's just harder.

It also helps with persuasion. No one wants you to be right if it hurts them. Respect and patience gives them emotional space to consider your ideas, whereas hostility gives them an incentive to shoot you down reflexively as a way to defend themself.

[-] Enjoyer_of_Games@hexbear.net 3 points 3 days ago

Do not pursue an enemy who simulates flight; do not attack soldiers whose temper is keen.

Do not swallow bait offered by the enemy. Do not interfere with an army that is returning home.

When you surround an army, leave an outlet free. Do not press a desperate foe too hard.

Such is the art of warfare.

[-] Juice@midwest.social 14 points 4 days ago

OP! Great recommendations for being concrete

every time I read theses on Feuerbach I do one push up

[-] MemesAreTheory@hexbear.net 14 points 4 days ago

geordi-no "Not everything needs a response"

geordi-yes "Don't ignore incorrect ideas or bad behavior"

Not everything needs a response if you're a LIB am I right? I NEVER logout, and you can't make me!

Kidding. Like a real leftist I have theory about how to be nice and comradely. I know we're all libs down here, but maybe one of us will scrape and claw our way out of Plato's cave of liberalism and read our way into being the one true leftist.

[-] 9to5@hexbear.net 11 points 4 days ago

Like a real leftist I didnt read the OP and am just responding directly to your comment. How was your day ?

[-] Civility@hexbear.net 7 points 3 days ago
[-] asdasd201@lemmygrad.ml 7 points 4 days ago

This looks good on theory, but when I see a smug and ignorant libshit who won't hear what I will say, I can't stop myself from insulting them.

[-] MemesAreTheory@hexbear.net 8 points 4 days ago

Yeah and I don't think spitting venom into the eyes of reactionaries is wrong, I do however think we (hexbear specifically) have a tendency to lose a respect and comradely tone with each other or baby leftists too. We gotta get the balance just right.

[-] asdasd201@lemmygrad.ml 2 points 4 days ago

The worst part of the text based communication is it is easier to misunderstand the tone. Double checking the text before replying is very important.

[-] Jabril@hexbear.net 5 points 4 days ago

I've found that for years leftists on the internet have struggled with the idea that the types of values they think they should uphold in a party or professional environment should also apply to unaccountable strangers/wreckers online. If someone is being intentionally obtuse, divisive, contrarian, anti-communist or uncharitable, they are not owed any respect and are themselves choosing to reject the type of comradliness we would all prefer to see in the world

[-] OttoboyEmpire@hexbear.net 2 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

be patient and polite; don't alienate; don't ignore bad behavior;

doesn't comport with site culture i'm afraid.

[-] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 2 points 4 days ago

I found a YouTube link in your post. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

this post was submitted on 27 Apr 2026
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