article texthappy April fool's btw

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[–] 246 points 6 months ago (7 children)
  • [–] 49 points 6 months ago (3 children)

    Haha, as I wake up and wipe the sleep crust from my eyes, I thought I was still dreaming (as in asleep). But your comment makes sense! Time to be skeptical all day!

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    [–] 181 points 6 months ago (27 children)

    God I fucking hate April fools Day.

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  • [–] 30 points 6 months ago

    We're fed so many lies all the time and when a big, obvious one like this shows up in the stream it's just another jolt of alarm that my system can't keep taking anymore. If we lived in happier and more peaceful times I might have enjoyed it even.

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    [–] 91 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    Made me do a double take. The way the world is right now, it wouldn't be the most shocking thing.

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  • [–] 60 points 6 months ago (3 children)

    I fucking hate April Fools

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    [–] 58 points 6 months ago* (36 children)

    Oh boy this is why I hate most April fool jokes.
    They are generally not funny, just stupid.

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  • [–] 6 points 6 months ago (18 children)

    Having a sense of humor helps.

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  • [–] 5 points 6 months ago* (5 children)

    There is nothing in the headline that is joke adjacent; it falls flat as a joke and therefore isn’t a good April Fools joke.

    The Onion get this correct, that a joke has to have some context to be funny. This ain’t it.

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  • [–] 6 points 6 months ago (4 children)

    The joke is obvious for anyone who knows the situation with AMD and Intel for the last few decades. AMD buying Intel would be a monopoly issue, and AMD has survived as the smaller company keeping Intel from being a monopoly.

    This is as obviously a joke as saying that the New England Patriots will be changing their name to the New England Redcoats. Sure, you need to know who the Patriots and Redcoats are to get the joke, but if you know literally anything about football and US history the joke is obvious. Or a hockey team choosing to change to focus on ice dancing. Or a Thai restaurant choosing to forgo spices.

    All of those require a small bit of context to be funny. All humor requires context to be funny. Just because you didn't understand the context doesn't make it funny.

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  • [–] 6 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (3 children)

    The problem with your explanation is that Intel is troubled enough to be purchased, and the US currently has no issue allowing monopolies. In a world in which Paramount is buying Warners, and Sysco is buying Restaurant Depot, AMD buying struggling Intel is not an obvious joke. Or at least it isn’t without some additional tag. “AMD set to buy beleaguered Intel in an all-DDR5 deal.”

    Look at any of the websites trying to be the Onion. They seldom get the thing that makes Onion headlines just right.

    Your Patriots joke works (and would be a pretty good April Fools joke) because it’d come out of nowhere. If you make the same joke but about the Washington Commanders changing their name to the Corporals (a joke structured the same way as yours), it wouldn’t be as obviously a joke because that team has a history of name changes and Trump telling them to change their name isn’t out of the realm of possibility. Your Patriots joke also works because the joke isn’t that they’re changing their name, it’s that they are changing their name to the opposite. “New England Patriots changing their name” isn’t funny. “AMD buying Intel” contains the same amount of information; that is to say nothing funny.

    I said before that a joke has to have context to make sense. That’s not quite right. It has to have context and we all have to kinda agree what that context is. You assuming that an AMD/Intel monopoly is impossible is what makes the headline a joke for you, but if I disagree about the context (that said monopoly is possible) than it doesn’t work. Judging from the other replies, I don’t think I’m the only one for whom it doesn’t work.

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    [–] 55 points 6 months ago* (3 children)

    I read this from the start with the mind that it's probably an April fool's joke, but not once did I see any indication to exaggerate or build up to a humorous absurdness. It's just a long article that could be true but isn't. Stupid and a waste of time.

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  • [–] 8 points 6 months ago

    I agree, but it's still better than the "pranks" that hugely wink at you and think they're clever, but they're obviously some marketing team trying to come up with ideas that aren't offensive..... yeah, I said it, this dreck is better than that dreck. heh.

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    [–] 44 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    this article has apparently caused AMD +3.61% ▲ and Intel INTC +8.84% ▲

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  • [–] 26 points 6 months ago (3 children)

    Wouldn't the SEC look upon jokes like this poorly?

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  • [–] 19 points 6 months ago

    Ah shit lol.

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  • [–] 17 points 6 months ago (9 children)

    Next up: Boeing Buys Airbus 🤣

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  • [–] 20 points 6 months ago (5 children)
  • [–] 9 points 6 months ago (4 children)
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    [–] 13 points 6 months ago

    lol. Nice April Fools post. I think the cruelest tech related Aprils fools post I’ve seen claimed that Apple was open sourcing their x86 MacOS versions. Creating a Mac binary compatible BSD distro. That really hurt. I love OSx/2010s MacOS. Nothing on Linux or BSD side comes close. I am really holding out hope for RayvnOS.

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  • [–] 8 points 6 months ago

    Rumors say they will buy Nvidia after.

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