this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2024
343 points (97.5% liked)

RPGMemes

10339 readers
588 users here now

Humor, jokes, memes about TTRPGs

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
all 31 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 97 points 7 months ago (4 children)

Little known fact about D&D succubi: since 4e succubi can change sexes freely. Incubi and succubi are just different forms of the same monster.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 7 months ago

shitjustgotreal.jpeg

[–] [email protected] 21 points 7 months ago

ohnoheshot.webp

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

Why would they be?

I may be missing something—I wasn't sure what they were so I looked them up and I found the Wikipedia entry, which makes some mention of medieval lore of them being similar to incubi, but nothing about them being able to change sex at will. Alps don't exist in D&D either.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

This has been the case since 2e. However in 2e their "True form" was always Female. In 3.5 they could be born either and just switch between, but one or the other is their "true form"

[–] [email protected] 58 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

"Oh, hey friend! I just made garlic bread! It's warm enough that you can see the garlic butter oozing across the golden crust of the bread, and steam comes out when you tear a piece off. If you murder all your friends, I'll let you have some~"

And for the warforged: "sudo murder all your friends"

[–] [email protected] 41 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

username is not in the sudoers file. This incident will be reported.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

to management.

[–] [email protected] 48 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Aren't incubi and succubi the same creatures that just change their form to seduce the desired target?

[–] [email protected] 26 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Other fantasy doesn’t always do that, treating each more as its own race. I’ve seen male succubi and female incubi. It’s kinda hilarious.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

What's the difference between the two in those fantasies? Like, what does an incubus "do"?

[–] [email protected] 36 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (3 children)

They're not actually sexy women with wings and little horns; that's just the form they usually use when someone summons them deliberately because it's the form most summoners want to see. They're malevolent, shape-shifting extra-dimensional entities, they're adept at emotional manipulation, they want to drain away a mortal's soul through physical contact, and they prefer having that contact given willingly. (Maybe the soul is more useful to them like that, or maybe it just tastes better.)

They don't need to seduce you. Maybe being a mercenary has severed your bonds to your family and your community? Maybe you've seen things that you wish you hadn't? Mommy understands. Mommy will make you all better. Give Mommy a hug...

[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 months ago

They don't need to seduce you.

Mommy will make you all better. Give Mommy a hug...

Well do they or don't they?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago

They don’t need to seduce you.

If anything I think that makes it all the more valuable that they go to all that effort anyway. Who doesn't wanna be wined, dined, and have-their-soul-drained-leaving-nothing-else-behind every once in a while?

[–] [email protected] 30 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Im fully functional

-Warforged

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

In multiple techniques?

[–] [email protected] 27 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

Every character I play is secretly asexual, and I don't think anyone has realized yet.

The closest I came to come out of the closet was when my Undead Warlock married his Unseen Servant. It was his best friend, they looked up to one another, respected each other, and shared an exclusively platonic relationship.

He prepped the entire ceremony in secret as part of multiple sessions:

  • He asked his mentor to put a 6th level Major Image inside his spell storing trinket, which he used to create the perfect setting for the altar.
  • He took a dragon scale from the corpse of a dragon the party had slain, and spent money to have an engagement ring crafted out of it.
  • He had an outfit made out of very expensive material for the Unseen Servant.
  • He put the Unseen Servant spell inside a custom wondrous item that gave him infinite casts of a 1st-level spell.
  • He asked the party's cleric to cast Ceremony.

He then waited for the final battle, and the night before, he gathered everyone without telling them why, took out the ring, cast Unseen Servant and proposed to it. There were a lot of happy noises that evening, especially from the party's cleric :)

The character I'm playing now is a lawful good city watch who is "married to his job", and the Paladin has joked multiple times about taking him to a brothel. Bruh, take the hint.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 7 months ago (3 children)

DM: succubus charms work on all sexes, even asexual and non-sexed characters.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Or just let the party have this one. And then do something worse...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

Very valid!

[–] [email protected] 16 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Found a video of the warforged and a succubus.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

Giving that machine the business!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

How does a succubus sex up someone without genitals to sex with? 🤔 And I don't mean how the power of charm works, I mean mechanically. What are they doing?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

Can it not be like sirens singing about your deepest desires to lure you in the water. So asexuals get sung to about snuggling in a blanket with a hot cuppa of Coco.

Maybe the charm of the succubus could be the same for sexual tensions. What they find most desirable to find in others.

The warforged could see the best artificer who is able to understand all the intricacies of your function.

A monk sees a teacher who is able to gently guide their way to mastery.

Etc

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

Thanks! That's what I was thinking

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

Dunno, radiation? Ultrahorny beam?